PROBASHI- A Cultural News Magazine Volume 2 Issue 2 | Page 55
Probashi-Poetry Section
Readers Contribution
CONFUSED, AM I?
Tanya Sengupta
I often ask myself, why am I here!
I ask myself, who is my dear!
I ask myself whether, I am worth this mankind!
I ask myself if I am not, will anybody mind!
Questioning myself has somewhat become a habit,
Answers to which I stitch comfortably bit by bit,
This journey seems unending and mysterious,
Maybe because it concerns me and my life,
About which I am bit too serious.
My mind suggests something someday,
Which my heart disapproves and pushes it at bay,
After every confrontation, my heart overpowers my mind slowly,
Becomes defensive and stops it to think rationally,
My mind says it is often that heart rules,
My heart says it is mind which fools,
It seems that the tussle between my mind and the heart will never end
For which, later in my life, I will have to repent
It is true that I am impatient and ambitious,
And hope for a life which is respectful and gracious,
Then,
Shall I ask my mind to be stronger than my heart,
And follow a path much away from it and be apart?
Shall I ask it to be forgiving and positive,
And leave the worldly happiness and not be possessive!,
Shall I ask my mind to be ignorant to petty talks,
And let those people loose for whom it rocks?
Someday my mind will be much richer than my heart, I am sure,
May be even learn the art of living and will mature,
Will I be not asking anymore questions about myself then?
Will I be not asking anymore questions about life which symbolises a den?
Will I be composed and focussed than before?
Will I be more blessed than cursed anymore!
Will I be this, will I be that?
With passing time, life keeps on paying the VAT,
It is not that only I am confused, am I?
It is also you, who read your life like mine.
Painting by Alexander Henry Bowler (1824-1903) titled ‘Doubt’. The word,
‘Resurgam’, inscribed on the headstone, translates as ‘I shall rise again’. An
optimistic reply by the Painter to the question raised by the Poet
53