by Charlie Boothe
Opposites Attract...and Repel
It was a classic case
of opposites attract,
followed by the eventual and
inevitable reality that they may
attract at first, but then repel.
The infatuation was real, of
course, as those emotions usually
are. Very powerful, like
in, this is THE ONE! Finally, I
have found my true love!
Experience can be cruel
teacher. I know. Been there,
done that. More than once. I’m
a slow learner.
So when my oldest daughter
told me she had a serious
relationship with a guy, I was
anxious to meet him, of course.
Sadly, he was about as different as her as night is to
He was, she said, a very handsome guy and very
nice. But after I had been around him for a short
period of time I saw neither.
I am no judge of looks in a man, I guess, so I certainly
could be wrong about that.
But he was clearly self-centered and juvenile,
probably wanting a mother and a maid, certainly a
woman he could be in charge of.
I knew my daughter did not fit in those categories.
Not at all.
Not only that, they had few shared interests.
Although I told her the truth about my evaluation
of him, in quite strong terms, she paid little, if any,
The source of the old saying, “Love is blind.”
Red flags were everywhere, and she either ignored
them or figured that, well,
it’s not that bad and he will
change. They are getting along
fine, so they can work out any
Besides, she said, he’s smart
and he is maturing. Love conquers
People rarely change. Things
another person does to irritate
you only get worse.
Finally, mercifully, she
dumped him before she made
the mistake of marrying the
The initial Infatuation is
Many years ago a friend and
I were philosophizing on what is the perfect mate.
She said it’s someone who is a mirror of yourself, or
close to it.
The more alike you are, the better. And if you have
any differences, they should complement each other.
I questioned whether I agreed, because I had never
considered wanting to be with someone just like me.
With experience, though, including some bad judgments
along the way, I eventually learned she was
exactly right. The more alike you are, the more likely
you will have a lasting relationship.
If you think alike, have a similar sense of humor,
enjoy doing many of the same things, have an ability
to be on the same page with about everything – yes,
that works, and works well.
Even when the differences surface, and some
always will, they really should complement each
other. That may be a difference in spending habits
or handling various situations or preferences related
to taking care of the house and kids.
50 Prerogative Magazine