Connecting people is a craft that has to be learned from the bottom up. When I first started to network, I was doing all the wrong things. I had to read up on it and learn from those that researched the topic so that I could become the expert connector I now have become.
First, you need to know how to network in order to meet the people you want to connect with and connect to. To do that you need to start a conversation that is not just about you, but first to get to know the other person you are first meeting. Instead of asking the usual question of “what do you do?” try something like “what brings you to this event?” or “what is your passion in life?” That is, get to know the person first before you try to sell them anything you have to offer. Offer to meet for coffee to get to learn more about them.
While you do this, start to build a contact list broken down by industry so that if someone is looking for a realtor or a financial planner, you can easily look them up and send out an email introduction to both parties.I have spent two years, joining 36 meetup groups and all of the chambers of commerce in the tri-state area of New York, New Jersey and Connecticut (you don’t have to actually join the chambers of commerce to attend their networking events) and I was going to an average of three to four events a week. I also tried to arrive about a half hour before the event actually started so that I could first get to know the host of the event as well as speak to those that also arrived early.
The other reason to arrive early is that you are able to have a normal conversation with the early bird arrivals before the venue fills up and the noise level goes up several decimals. Add a DJ with music to the mix which typically gets louder as the night progresses and you have the challenge of talking over everyone else and the music. I usually leave this kind of event earlier than later as I first start to lose my voice from talking over the noise and I find it so much harder to hear what the other person is saying which defeats the purpose to network in the beginning.
As you build your contact list, you will find that when you meet new people, you learn what they are looking for in terms of who they would like to meet and you can then start to connect people you know and are comfortable to do so.
If you are not sure how to network effectively, I would suggest an easy read of a book I first read which was most informative: Endless Referrals by Bob Burg. (no, I don’t get any commission on any sold!)
I hope that helps you with becoming the “Connector” you want to be.
Jon Landers founded The Big Apple Indie Music Series aka TBAIMS in January of 2013 after spending two years in research and development, which included studying the best way to network by reading up on the subject, joining 36 Meeetup groups and all the chambers of commerce in the tri-state area of New York, New Jersey and Connecticut.
How to Start Making Connections
By Jon Landers