Positive about Change September 2013 - Page 10

If you're kind to other people, how come you're so hard on yourself?

By Sarah McCrum

We are all one. We hear that often now. We are understanding from the worlds of science and spirituality that the universe is like a sea of energy and every part of it is connected to every other part.

So what does this mean for our relationships? I have observed that there is a very strong tendency for people who are on a path of personal development to be extremely hard on themselves. In fact, I would go so far as to describe many people as being tyrannical, bullying, aggressive and I could use many other extremely negative expressions - but only towards themselves. Towards other people they can be endlessly forgiving, kind, patient, loving and more.

Ironically, the more we learn about consciousness, Law of Attraction, mindset, energy and the whole myriad of associated topics, the more we tend to be hard on ourselves - even as we practice becoming ever more positive and compassionate towards others.

And then we wonder why things don't work out very well. Why other people can be so unkind towards us, when we go out of our way to be kind to them. And above all we wonder why we find it so hard to just "feel good."

We can feel good in our minds by thinking positive thoughts, but it always leaves that sense that there's something missing. There is a strain beneath the happiness, or an internal tension that never really disappears.

For me personally this was the hardest challenge I faced in 24 years of highly committed personal development. It was simple. I never really felt that good. I knew, deep inside myself, that there was something missing. And I felt really sad. I was disappointed in myself and in life. I didn't want to blame other people - I knew better than that - so I blamed myself. And I was hard.