Pickleball Magazine 4-5 WD | Page 63

DISSED PICKLEBALL COURT ON THE BY CAROLYN MILAZZO MURPHY got my feelings hurt for the first time playing pickleball. I went up to a group of three young men looking for a fourth, and they refused to play with me. “I’d feel really bad slamming the ball at you,” said a 20-something. “It looks like that other court is wrapping up their game, so we’re going to wait and see if they want to mix things up with us,” said another 20-something. I can take a hint, so I walked off the court trying to maintain my composure and dignity. But they insulted me and I was hurt. They dismissed me without giving me a chance, assuming I couldn’t hold my own. Do you know how many times I’ve played with weaker players? Too many times to count. But that’s what you do when you’re a good sport. You play with someone when they ask; you give them a shot. Isn’t that what pickleball is all about? I’m not sure why these guys dissed me, but I suspect it’s because I’m a woman of a certain age. My friend and frequent pickleball partner John agrees. “I think it’s a combination of machismo and sexism,” he said. I’ve got news for them—neither has a place in pickleball, where finesse and strategy are more important than power, and men and women routinely share the court. The sport is a lot more welcoming to women than golf or tennis. Just ask women how many times they’ve dealt with macho men in either sport. than other sports, including tennis. But over the past few years, the game is drawing younger players. Along with speed and power, some of the younger players are packing a little attitude. At our Tuesday night drop-in that draws about 30 players, nearly half are in their 20s and 30s. Though most are open to competing with older players, some of the young turks seem intent on keeping with their own. Granted, their game is mostly slam-jam, but nothing an experienced and, dare I say, older player couldn’t handle. One of the best things about pickleball is that it’s a great equalizer, and one of the most democratic games ever invented. Older folks can play against players half their age, and women and men can compete on equal footing because the game isn’t about power, but reflexes and strategy. Perhaps this is why I was so surprised by the snub. I’ve never had men refuse to play with me. The slight occurred during open court time for leveled play. A coordinator helps direct people to courts, but you’re often on your own because games finish at different times. When you see a court that looks competitive, you pounce. Most people are more than willing to give you a shot. The three men were standing on a court waiting for another game. I walked up and said, “Come on, let’s play.” Um, not so fast, Toots. One of the best things about pickleball is that it’s a Pickleball is hugely popular with the 50-and-over crowd, mainly because the smaller court and lighter paddles are easier on the body I didn’t realize how much they hurt my feelings until I was in the middle of my next game. I suddenly had that sinking feeling you get in third grade and are picked last for the kickball team. It stung just as much at 60 as it did at 8. To add insult to injury, they played with men who I'd soundly beaten later that night. great equalizer, and one of the most democratic games ever invented. Let’s keep it that way. I am by no means a shrinking violet, and many of my female pickleball friends were shocked I didn’t stand my ground. But it was clear I wasn’t wanted, and I felt sheepish. No one wants to feel they’re playing a game under protest. Continued on page 62 SEPTEMBER/OCTOBER 2019 | MAGAZINE 61