PBCBA BAR BULLETINS pbcba_bulletin_May 2019 - Page 27

WELLNESS & HEALTH C o r n e r Where Do You Live? BRIAN M. MOSKOWITZ Where do you live? No, not your address - where do you live on the timeline of your life? Do you live in the past, the present, or the future? Most people live in the future based on their past. How’s that for a brain twister? What I mean is they spend their time in the present, thinking about the future, through the lens of the past. Maybe it’s time to change your address and move to the present. “Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, and Today is a Gift. That’s why it’s called the Present.” That meeting you have planned for next week, when you think about it right now how do you feel? How about that conversation you’ve been putting off with a loved one? Or that night out with friends this weekend? The way you feel right now about that future event is based on your past experience in similar situations. If past meetings have been dreadful and boring, you will most likely think the next meeting will be dreadful and boring. If past nights out with friends have been fun and exciting, you’ll get excited just thinking about going out. And by doing so, you’ve robbed yourself of the present moment. The present moment. Right here; right now. You miss out on the present because instead of experiencing the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and touch of the moment as it envelops you, you experience it through the mind’s expectation of how it should be. And when you pre-judge the moment based on an expectation pulled from your past, you unconsciously behave in a way to meet your expectations. But what if the moment doesn’t meet your expectations? What happens then? Go back to a time when you had an expectation that wasn’t met. What did you do? Did you fight reality? Did you tell yourself it’s not supposed to be this way? How did you feel? What if you traded your expectations for appreciation? What if you arrived at the present moment with no expectation of the outcome and just appreciated the moment as is? How different would you feel? PBCBA BAR BULLETIN 27 Brian M. Moskowitz is a Partner in the West Palm Beach Office of Shutts & Bowen, LLP, practicing Marital & Family Law. He can be reached at [email protected] com.