Reward Success
If you ’ re struggling to get your child to sleep in his own bed , set up a token reward system using items like marbles , gold stars , cotton balls or poker chips .
“ You can ’ t make them sleep , but you can reward them for staying in their room ,” Sosland says .
For example , each night your child stays in her room , she earns a token that can be cashed in for a small reward immediately or saved up for a bigger reward later .
Facts about Fear of the Dark
ཞ Fear of the dark usually begins around the age of 2 or 3 .
ཞ Fear of the dark can continue into early adolescence .
ཞ Among 8 to 12-year-olds , it ’ s the third most common and upsetting fear .
Source : Dr . Jane Sosland
Can a supplement help ?
Many pediatricians recommend melatonin , an over the counter supplement , for children who struggle to sleep . Consult with your child ’ s doctor to find out if this option might be right for your youngster .
Avoid ideas like “ monster spray ” which only affirm in a child ’ s mind that monsters are real and need to be “ sprayed away .” ~ Berkley James
Additional Resources
• Family Sleep Institute
• National Sleep Foundation
• Check out the children ’ s book Uncle Lightfoot , Flip that Switch : Overcoming Fear of the Dark by Mary Coffman , which researchers have found particularly effective in helping kids ( for ages 5-8 ).
Work on breathing techniques . If your child already struggles with anxiety , teach him coping mechanisms during the day that you can employ at night too . For example , have a younger child blow bubbles to calm down .
Teach older children deep belly breathing . Have them breathe in for five seconds and slowly breath out as if you have a birthday candle in front of you .
“ But you don ’ t want to blow it out . You just want the ‘ flame ’ to flicker ,” Sosland advises .
Offer a transitional object . Comfort your youngster with a stuffed animal or a special blanket to help him sleep . If you ’ ve become your child ’ s favorite teddy bear , begin phasing out his reliance on you by getting up just as he ’ s falling asleep . If he starts to protest , promise that you ’ ll check in on him in five minutes .
If he ’ s in the habit of snuggling up with you in your bed and you prefer independent sleeping arrangements , have him transition to a pallet next to your bed . Eventually , move his bed back down toward his own bedroom .
Set up a sleep-promoting environment . White noise , fans , sound machines and soft background music can push back the deafening silence of the night . Also make sure your child ’ s bed is comfortable , the temperature in the room is cool and put away any distracting electronic devices .
“ Have your child take some control of the environment ,” James recommends . “ Place the night light where they like it , bring their special lovey to bed , or even have a special blanket to ‘ keep them safe .’ By letting them take some ownership in the organization and arrangement of their room , they will feel more comfortable in their sleep space .”
Stick with a bedtime routine . Take time to reminisce about happy events from the day . Listen to soothing music and put aside electronics . Read a calming , uplifting book together before bed . And help them come up with a positive image that they can picture as they ’ re drifting off to sleep like playing with their favorite pet .
If your child ’ s nighttime anxiety continues to worsen , consult your family physician .
Freelance journalist Christa Melnyk Hines is the mom of two boys . She finds that the spooky Halloween season can make night-time ’ s shadows , creaks and groans even creepier . Christa is the author of Happy , Healthy & Hyperconnected : Raise a Thoughtful Communicator in a Digital World .
24 | ST JOHNS Parent MAGAZINE