Parent Magazine Flagler October 2019 | Page 14

try to hide the fact that they’re wannabe cyberbullies: this will only “Limiting online exposure helps keep cyberbullied, assure them ahead of exacerbate the problem. Tara Fishler, the bullies at bay.” time that they can always come to a prominent expert on mediation you with any problem, no matter and conflict resolution, says that how big or small. It’s very important, “responding lets the bully know they say Drs. Sameer Hinduja and Justin affected you. Not posting a response Patchin of the Cyberbullying gives you some control so you Research Center, to “cultivate and are not sucked into their harmful maintain open, candid lines of activities.” Instead, help block any communication with your children, wannabe cyberbullies from reaching so that they’re ready and willing your kids. to come to you whenever they experience something unpleasant or distressing in cyberspace.” More generally, teach your kids to think carefully before they post anything online. They need to understand the potential repercussions from anything they post, including how certain posts could be used maliciously. A good rule of thumb is to say and do online only what you would say and do As part of your regular conversations face-to-face to someone. Your kids with your kids, teach them safe should understand that as soon as online habits. This includes such they post something, it’s out of their Assure your kids ahead of time that basic online security measures control. Their posts can be forwarded you won’t ban them from going as never revealing identifying, without their knowledge or consent. online if they come to you for help. personal information like their home Ruth Carter, a lawyer who specializes As Dr. Michael Nuccitelli, a well- addresses, phone numbers, and in social media and internet law, says known child psychologist and expert where they go to school; not sharing “Kids should be taught early and on cyberbullying, says, consistently their usernames and passwords with often that they have no idea when a remind your kids that “they’ll others; not leaving online accounts post will take on a life of its own and not lose their online privileges, accessible and vulnerable on public go places they can’t control.” A more interactive online gaming time, devices; and never opening messages strict but no less useful approach mobile devices or social network site and links from people they don’t would be to establish actual “rules” privileges due to cyberbullying issues already know. for your kids’ online activities, provided they are open, honest and forthright.” Try not to overreact to situations as this will make your kids think that you’ll overreact if they tell you about being cyberbullied. Your kids should also learn to select appropriate privacy settings on their online accounts, so that they only accept friends or follow requests including deciding which sites they’re allowed to access, for how long, and what they are permitted to do on those sites. from people they personally know A final way you can protect your When you speak to your kids about and allow posts to be broadcast only kids from becoming the victims of their online activities, encourage to their circle of friends or followers. cyberbullying is to stay in regular them not to respond in kind to As Mrs. Brown succinctly puts it, contact with their teachers. Since a kid’s cyberbullies are often to be found among his or her class - or school mates, teachers are some of the best sources of information about any potential problems at school. It’s important that you speak to their teachers not just about how they’re doing academically but also socially. Teachers may notice troubling interactions inside or outside the classroom. 14 | F L A G L E R parent M A G A Z I N E