Parent Magazine Flagler June 2022 | Page 14

Beyond Burnout & Bickering :

Avoid Overscheduling So Kids Can Individuate

By Christina Katz

School , sports , after-school activities , birthday parties , and social commitments — all of these things compete for your child ’ s energy and attention on a daily basis . And now that kids are hopping on social media at increasingly younger ages , the pressure to participate can become fierce early on . All those images of friends playing sports , hanging out at a pool party , or posing together in a gleeful gaggle may cause your child to feel like his schedule doesn ’ t quite measure up .

But no matter whose idea it is to keep kids busy and social 24-7 , it ’ s ultimately every parent ’ s job to make sure kids don ’ t fall into the over-scheduling trap . Kids need their parents to make space for them to just be so they don ’ t feel compelled to constantly do-do-do .
If parents don ’ t take an active role in supporting each child ’ s individuality , then their uniqueness is going to take a back seat to their busy schedule , and this can create feelings of isolation or even depression in kids and lay the groundwork for workaholism later in life .
Kids discover their sense of self in the quiet moments of life when they can relax , be themselves and let their instincts lead . If they can ’ t find quiet , reflective moments in their overly busy lives , identifying individual desires may be delayed or denied . So be smarter than your sources , parents . Don ’ t let your child ’ s individuality get overlooked because you are keeping him steadily overbooked .
Prioritize the Calendar . Before you add another activity into the busy mix , pause and consider what ’ s already on the schedule for the entire family . It ’ s only natural to want to do it all , but saying yes to everything will only exhaust everyone and cut into valuable family time . If you can manage another addition , consider it . If you can ’ t , then it ’ s time to prioritize .
Focus On Enrichment . Does the activity bring more joy and energy into your child ’ s life , or does it create conflicts and anxiety ? Joining the competitive soccer league may sound fun , but if your child does not enjoy
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