Happy Family, Happy Life
Learn eight simple secrets of happy families
By Christa Melnyk Hines
H
appiness can vary depending on our personal
circumstances. But why are some families more
resilient and happier despite the obstacles life
throws their way?
They hang out together. Happy families feel a strong
with their sons, which includes reading books together
and quietly reflecting on the day.
They cheer for each other. Celebrate your kids’
interests and successes by acknowledging their efforts
rather than zeroing in on what went wrong:
sense of connection with each other. According to child-
family therapist Jennifer Jackson-Rice, LSCSW/LSCW, real
connection takes as little as five minutes a day. • “I loved watching you play.”
Sit next to each other during homework time, cook
together, read books at bedtime, and chat with each
while driving to activities. • “Great job on your test. I can tell you really
concentrated.”
Create calmer, more cheerful mornings by prepping the
night before or getting yourself up a little earlier. “When we praise our children, self-esteem goes up.
When self-esteem is high, connection is good, behaviors
are good,” Jackson-Rice says.
“That connection in the first part of the day can carry
kids throughout the day,” Jackson-Rice says. They seek fulfillment. While material items like the
Michelle Hon, a mom of two boys, ages 4 and 2, agrees.
She says that the first 30 minutes in the morning and
the last 30 minutes before bedtime help her family feel
grounded, calm and loved.
“We do a lot of snuggles and cuddles in
the morning, and we try not to make
that a rushed time in our home,”
Hon says.
In the evening, she and her
husband Michael stick
to a bedtime routine
14 | F L A G L E R parent M A G A Z I N E
• “I like how you colored this so neatly!”
latest electronics, designer jeans and trendy toys
may bring fleeting joy, they won’t deliver lasting
contentment.
“I don’t think we can teach our kids to be happy if we’re
looking to external sources to feed that emotion,” says
Cati Winkel, owner of The Empowered Parent Coach.
And that includes looking to others for validation
of self-worth, which can result in
behaviors like people-pleasing or
obsessing over likes on social
media.