Tunnel vision
By: Doreen McCrindle
She won’t stop staring. Cold and unblinking, she regards me
with contempt.
I don’t sleep much anymore. I’m too afraid. Afraid of those
ice-blue dead eyes judging me, mocking me – always staring.
I’ve tried everything; squeezing my eyes tight to blot out her
face but yet she lingers, even behind my closed lids. Forever
staring.
I can no longer leave my cramped, barren room to escape her
glare. The ancient television propped up on a milk crate in the
musty corner provides no relief or distraction -- its broken
antenna produces only static, which seems to act more as a
conduit for her vile, mocking whispers.
Often when I had dared to leave my room, strangers would
turn and watch me shuffle by as I muttered obscenities at the
whispers in my mind. Like her, they would often stare.
My last excursion to the outside world, however, was somewhat of a success. Braving the sibilant murmurs creeping into
my mind and the hostile glares of more strangers, I finally
made it to the market at the end of the street.
Clutching my purchase close to my chest, I scuttled home;
hoping, praying, _knowing_ it was the answer to my prayers.
Sitting in front of the dusty, cracked dresser mirror, I remove
the melon baller from the crumpled paper bag and admire its
cool, sharp edges. I take one last, long look at my reflection.
At those dead, cold, ice-blue eyes – forever judging, forever
staring.
It ends tonight. I will be victorious. Raising the instrument of
my relief against the unending stare, I pause for the briefest
moment wondering
…what will stop the whis-
Born in the East end of Toronto in
the fall of 1968, Doreen (Dodie)
McCrindle first found her love of
reading at age 5 on the backs of
cereal boxes. Quickly graduating to
graphic novels, she discovered her
affinity for horror by hoarding used
copies of Weird Tales and Tales
from the Crypt –
much to the chagrin of her father, David.
A staunch animal lover and activist, Doreen also utilizes her writing
skills to contact and interact with various governmental, legal and
rescue organizations. She insists on being and is passionate about
being a voice for those who cannot speak for themselves.
After many years in the legal and medical fields, Doreen has currently
settled into her stay at home life in Calgary, Alberta with her
husband of 8 years, Lance and her three “fur-babies”
Doreen continues to hone her love of the craft of horror fiction and
speaking for the welfare of all animals.
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