44
DOMESTIC ABUSE
Domestic abuse is a crime
– and not always against
women: some men are
victims too.
Worryingly, nearly a third of
domestic abuse begins in
pregnancy and often, where
there is domestic abuse, you
can be certain that there will be
child abuse. However, victims
often do not report it for a
variety of reasons, including:
• guilt - they feel they are to
blame
• love - they love their partner
so much that they hope they
will change
• fear - they worry their
partner’s violence may
become worse if they report
them
• homelessness - they fear
they will be forced to leave
their home
• finances - they worry about
not managing financially
without their partner’s
income.
Why does it happen?
There are all sorts of reasons
why domestic abuse happens
but usually it is because the
abuser needs to feel that they
have power over the other
family members. This could
be because they were abused
themselves when they were
a child or at least witnessed
it happening at home. There
is help and support out there
for those at risk of becoming
abusers.
Warning signs
Women often don’t know that
they are – or are at risk of being
– abused because of general
lack of knowledge.
National charity Refuge has
come up with some helpful
warning signs that you can look
out for, in your relationships or
in those of friends or family for
which you are worried.
The key issue is the woman
(or man) must change the way
in which they behave because
they are frightened of what
might happen otherwise.
Other clues
If the abusive partner:
• acts in a jealous and
possessive manner
• attempts to stop her from
seeing friends and family
• can be very nice one minute
and threatening the next –
sudden mood changes
• says what she should wear,
who she should see, and how
much money she can spend
• frequently insults and
criticises her in front of other
people
• tries to frighten her to make
her do what he wants
• always puts her down and
says she can’t do anything
without him
• threatens to hurt other
people close to her if she
leaves or tells anyone.
You can read more
about the signs and
what to do at
www.refuge.org.uk.
sources of help
Childline: tel: 0800 1111
www.childline.org.uk
Men’s Advice Line: (for male victims of domestic
abuse). tel: 0808 801 0327
www.mensadviceline.org.uk/mens_advice.php
National Domestic Violence 24-hour helpline:
tel: 0808 2000 247
www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk
Oxfordshire Safeguarding Children Board:
tel: 01865 810628
www.oscb.org.uk
Police (non-emergency): 101
Police (EMERGENCY): 999
Reducing the Risk (Oxfordshire Domestic Abuse
Helpline) tel: 0800 731 0055
www.reducingtherisk.org.uk
Refuge: tel: 0808 2000 247
www.refuge.org.uk
RESPECT: (for potential abusers seeking help)
tel: 0808 8024040
www.respect.uk.net