OutBoise Magazine June 2015 | Page 47

47  |  OutBoise Magazine  |  2015 Pride Guide Trans Idaho outboise.com | Issue 8.2 | June 2015 By Dianne Piggott Boise Pridefest 2015 is here. I can’t help but think about how things are now for transgender people and how things used to be. In 1997 I started trying to understand how it was that this “gender buzz” in my head would never go away. How come I would put on women’s clothes and look in a mirror and feel like that person, that woman in the mirror was the real me? And why did she have a Mona Lisa smile. What did she know? Dial up modems and Netscape helped me find information and helped me see that there were other people like me, and there were options, that there was some vague kind of hope. But the people all seemed to be far away and in big cities like Portland and Seattle and San Francisco. I needed to find people like me in person, face to face. I saw listings of a group in Boise, but emails bounced and the phone number had been disconnected. Well, I thought, I’ll put an ad in the Boise Weekly and see if I find anybody! Before then I had met only one transsexual, when I was 19, and I was so deeply closeted and confused that I never said a thing to her. Amazingly, that ad brought results. There were other people like me! A few of us trans gals would get together on Saturdays and chat and then go to the Emerald Club afterwards. The legendary Mary Kelly owned the place and we would watch the drag shows and go home reeking of cigarette smoke. It was a safe place and we had some small community. It gave me courage and I learned a lot, but the rest of Boise was not so encouraging. Well, except for the Flying M. But there was scant other support in the area as a far as therapists or doctors for hormones. And most all of the trans people I knew lived in stealth, under cover out of a caution borne of necessity. I finally left Boise and went to Seattle to transition. I met more people there and started going to the Ingersoll Gender Center meetings. There was more community but there was a lot of marginalization and suffering, everyone seemed to be struggling so hard. There was a hierarchy in the trans community that divided the “true transsexuals” from the “heterosexual crossdressers.” You were judged based on your being pre or postoperative, based on how well you passed, even based on how long and how deeply you had suffered. It was stressful. And the outside world, the general public, still had no idea what to do with us or how to treat us. After almost two years of trying to go full time, trying to transition, trying to make enough to live, I gave up and left. I felt like fate had shown me that I wasn’t “worthy” or trans enough. I was confused and I wasn’t ready, and the world wasn’t ready. I came back to Boise and hid in denial for 12 more years. Funny thing, It didn’t go away. After twelve years I was still transgender. The pain and aching frustration hadn’t gone away. I still knew I had something to deal with and I hoped that things had changed. I popped my head up again and looked for community. And I almost cried with what I found! This time there were many other trans people in Boise! I found helpful and supportive transgender people who had found their way and made their lives work. I found Emilie Jackson- Edney and the people in the Tri States group. I found the wonderful Moms and the amazing, inspiring young people in the FATE group, I found PFLAG, and I found a vibrant and inclusive LGBT community. There were therapists and doctors in Boise who knew how to help trans women and trans men move forward in healthy ways. I hadn’t just found the light at the end of the tunnel, I had found the dawn of hope! Continued on page 49