OutBoise Magazine January 2016 | Page 19

19  |  OutBoise Magazine  | NEWS Tom, a staunch Mormon, had been through several programs to teach him how to suppress the urges he has to be with a man. He had met with religious leaders and had been put on religious probation because of his sexual encounters with men during his marriage. Thousands of dollars, many hours and a lot of heartache had been put into attempting to change him from a gay man to a heterosexual man. “Nothing worked to rid me of my gayness,” Tom says. OutBoisemag.com | Issue 14 | January 2016 thought of the relationship between their parents as a sham. I considered their ages in making my decision of when to come out. I also considered how educated, mature and liberal my children had become over the years. As parents, we had instilled in our kids to love and accept everyone. We had also taught our children to be honest in all that they do. I was direct, confident and humble as I proceeded to express who I have been since I was a child. “Kids, I have something to tell you. I am so proud to be your dad. I couldn’t have more loving, intelligent and amazing children. Over my lifetime there have been people that have loved me, supported me and stood by me. You three kids are some of those people. I brought you here to tell you who I truly am. I am your dad and I am gay.” The emotions were high, tears were streaming down my face and I could hardly breathe as I waited for their response. “You are awesome and we are proud of you. You are so strong dad!” I recall them saying. To answer the question, when is the right time to come out to your kids? Each person must decide for themselves. How much do you love yourself and what have you taught your children. Singer, Ricky Martin says, “These years in silence and reflection made me stronger and reminded me that acceptance has to come from within and that this kind of truth gives me power to conquer emotions I didn’t even know existed. Tom shared that he loves his wife and that he would do anything for his children, but that he is just not happy in his marriage. He also shared that he is not happy with himself because he cannot be who he truly is. Tom got the most emotional when he discussed his children and the fact that he had not told them and didn’t know if he ever would tell them that he is gay. “They are young, innocent and they would not understand, plus I don’t want to break my family apart,” Tom says. I had nightmares about the responses I might get from my children if I told them that I was gay. Teenagers that had seen their father and mother show love and affection for more than 16 years might be angry at the The strength my children spoke of and the power they exuded when I shared I was gay a year ago, made the choice of timing obsolete and it made the coming out moment a perfect one.