Our Valley Santa Clarita July/August 2017 | Page 23

DEAN
CHEESEMAN
OUR VALLEY SANTA CLARITA
The Joy of Getting Older
I’m not as young as I used to be and not that old either, but beginning to see signs of aging. I’m a ‘baby boomer’, which
means I was born between 1945 and 1965. That means I was born exactly between those years in 1955. So, I’m neither
a younger nor an older baby boomer. I’m a tweenomer.
Getting older freaks people out. I read where there’s more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than
on Alzheimer's research. This indicates that soon there will be a large elderly population with enhanced boy and girl parts
with absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.
I also read that as a man gets older, while he gets shorter and wider his nose and ears continue growing. I guess
someday I’ll look like Dumbo the elephant. I should stop reading so much. Sigh!
In truth, I’m getting used to getting older and like to say I’m ‘middle aged’. Yeah, if I live to over 100! My barber spends
more time on my nose and ears than my head***. My comb-over is pretty cool though. I think I have hair. Of course, he
only shows me the front in the mirror. I hate mirrors.
***Side note on men’s hair. I’m convinced that men don’t actually lose their hair, but it all just moves elsewhere. We still
have the same net amount of hair.
I have no patience for cooking anymore. I once made a meatloaf and the neighbors’ cat buried it. Lost my cell phone
once while making dinner and didn’t find it until the mashed potatoes started humming. At least I know when dinner’s
ready. That’s when the smoke detector goes off. Did I hear a rim shot?
Exercising can be such a bore anymore. I do try to keep in shape though, if you consider round a shape. My doctor
keeps telling me I need to lose weight. Obviously, I need a new doctor - preferably overweight. Really, what’s he going to
say?
I now live in a 55+ community***. Things are pretty laid back and the people are nice. My friends think I don’t have a life,
but they couldn’t be more wrong because I now have Bingo! I love the various games where they play different shapes
on the card like an arrow or checkerboard. My favorite is the walker.
***Another side note. You know you’re in a 55+ place when around the pool the women don’t have boobs, but the men
do.
I have fun poking fun at myself about getting older. Actually, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Yes, there’s more Real
Estate behind us than ahead, but there’s so much to remember. Growing up, getting married, buying the first house or
car, having children, watching them grow up and then being sad watching them leave. Grandchildren are cool though.
Just to name a few.
We make good decisions and bad. We have good and bad luck. Things work out and sometimes they don’t, but that’s
life. Life has many phases and this is just another. Just be happy we made it this far then pass the torch on to the next
generation and hope for the best.
Very philosophical, that’s so unlike me. I must be getting older.
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