On the Coast – Over 55 Issue 31 I September/October 2019 | Seite 26

Bouncing
B
y the time most of us hit middle
age, we have come to accept that
life is never going to smooth out
into an unbroken series of successes,
accolades and dreams fulfilled. We realise
that even the most outwardly privileged
in our community face trauma, grief and
other setbacks sometimes. We recognise
that it is our response to circumstances
outside our control that determines their
long-term impact on our lives.
The ability to ‘bounce back’ effectively
from difficulties – such as failure, grief
and loss – is also known as resilience. It
can be an important coping mechanism
for people facing chronic illness and
other age-related maladies. In fact, recent
research has linked resilience with
longevity, health and happiness amongst
older populations.
So, if resilience is such a good thing to
have, where does it come from? The good
news is, resilience is not an in-born
quality but one that can be developed
over a lifetime. There are some key factors
that influence resilience, all of which, at
least partially, are a matter of choice.
Adjusting attitude
Unsurprisingly, having an optimistic
outlook makes dealing with life’s ups
and downs much easier. This is does not
mean trying to ignore trauma or suppress
the strong emotions that accompany
loss. It is about being aware of our
thinking patterns and challenging the
ones that no longer work for us. Writing
can be a very effective tool in this
regard – either to help process sorrow or
disappointment, or to express gratitude
for our blessings, no matter how small.
Disrupting unhelpful thought loops and
shifting focus towards the positives is an
important part of building resilience.
Practising good self-care
When disaster strikes, self-care tends to
fall by the wayside. The death of a loved
one, for example, can be so overwhelming
that even getting out of bed seems like an
insurmountable task. Yet returning to
nurturing daily habits like personal
grooming, regular sleep and exercise can
really aid effective recovery. This is not
about creating a rigorous to-do list. It is
about being kind to yourself and doing
what you can manage on a given day.
Being resilient means accepting the
26
O N T H E C OA S T – OVER 5 5
back
BY ADRIENNE GARSIDE
ancient Chinese wisdom that a journey of
a thousand miles begins with a single step.
Seeking help and support
Many people tend to withdraw,
physically and emotionally, in times of
trouble. This impulse can be particularly
strong for men, who are often socially
conditioned to project stoicism and
‘soldier on’ at all costs. Fortunately,
there is an emerging acceptance, backed
by mental health research, that this is
unhealthy for the person struggling and
everyone around them. Resilient people
are those that tap into their support
networks, lean on their family, friends
and colleagues, and seek professional
help when it is required.
Tree of Dreams 2019
Iris Foundation’s annual Tree of Dreams campaign offers a chance
for Central Coast locals to acknowledge those they have lost and
to share hope for the future. In the weeks leading up to World
Suicide Prevention Day on September 10, the Tree of Dreams, located near the
entrance to Wyong Milk Factory, will be adorned with coloured tags carrying
messages of hope, support and remembrance from the local community.
This year’s Tree of Dreams will culminate in a community event on the Wyong
Milk Factory grounds on Sunday, September 8. The public will be invited to
write their own messages on a paper lantern which will float down the Wyong
River at dusk. Music, hot drinks and a supportive atmosphere will be offered to
all who attend. Everyone welcome.
River of Reflections
DATE: Sunday, September 8, 2019
TIME: 5.30-7.30pm
LOCATION: G
 rassed area near Allsorts Gym,
Wyong Milk Factory, 141 Alison Road, Wyong
MORE INFORMATION: https://treeofdreams.org.au
Adrienne Garside works for Iris Foundation, a charity that aims to reduce the risk of suicide on the
Central Coast. The Foundation achieves this by facilitating and supporting awareness campaigns,
programs and partnerships which enhance community connectedness and well-being. For more
information, please visit: www.irisfoundation.org.au.