On the Coast – Families Issue 99 I April/May 2019 | Page 8

14 day
challenge
greater connection
with your child
by Lindie Nell
F
or the next 14 days parents
are encouraged to try the
challenge to a greater connection
with your child. During this time
try to avoid asking too many
questions, criticize and reprimand
your child, instead validate your
child’s feelings as it comes up
during the day and focus on
closeness with your child.
You may think that you are doing all these
things, but you will be surprised by how
quickly a week can go by with rushing to
hundreds of activities and to do’s without
really connecting with your child.
Try to look for opportunities that
are already part of your daily routine,
where you can slow down and create an
opportunity for connection. Maybe when
you’re in the car with just one child in
the afternoon, or at bedtime when you
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KI DZ O N T H E C OA S T
lie with your child for a few minutes,
or maybe when you sit with one child
and wait while your other child is at her
dance class. Be creative with your time.
The following ideas are intended for
you to do with your child for 5-15 minutes
a day. If you have more than one child, do
this individually with each child.
Day 1
Tell your child that your life is so much
greater for having her in your life. “Your
happy giggles in the morning give me so
much joy every day”.
Day 2
Give your child a 20 second hug. One of
the most effective ways to stimulate
oxytocin (also known as the love or
bonding hormone) is to hug your child for
a time period of no less than twenty
seconds. Also make sure to give your kids
a hug during certain times of the day,
such as before they leave for school, when
they get home from school, and before
bedtime. Why not do this every day?
Day 3
Look for an opportunity to join in with
whatever your child is doing. Even if
they play on the computer or watch TV.
Join them, sit with them and just be
really present and interested in what
they are doing. They will notice and love
having you hang with them.
Day 4
Give your child a hand, foot or back
massage. Back rubs and foot massages
are a wonderful way to bond with your
child, these tension relievers show your
child that he is loved, cared for, and
important.
Day 5
Read your child a story or poem or read a
book with them.
Or Listen to each other’s favourite songs.