OMG Digital Magazine OMG Issue 330 25th October 2018 | Page 5

OMG Digital Magazine | 330 | Thursday 25 October 2018 • PAGE 5
Confessions
I LIE ABOUT MY ETHNICITY
I'm white passing and when I moved to Canada no one asked me what my race was. Canadians
would sometimes ask me if I was from Russia, The Netherlands, France, Romania, Ukraine, Italy, Spain,
Germany etc but they could never tell that I wasn't white.
Lying about my ethnicity has made my life easier, I don't have to deal with questions about why I look
a certain way. When the census comes, I'm going to write down my ethnicity as white. Fewer problems
for me.
I’m lost
I GET HAPPY WHEN I SEE OTHER
PEOPLE GENUINELY HAPPY.
Whenever I see a YouTube video and I see the YouTuber go on a happy rant, I can tell that they are
genuinely happy when they are talking on that particular subject. Or when I’m hanging out with my
friends I can see the look on some of their faces that they completely contempt with their life and
they look like they are happy in that exact moment. These are honestly the moments I live for and it
just make me all happy inside when I see things like this happen. That’s all I got to say, idk if this is the
right sub for that but yeah there you go.
I have been depressed for quite sometime and I feel that I eventually
lost myself in it. Whenever I was with my different group of “friends” my
personality would always change to adapt to theirs and I feel that I am
no longer able to express who I really am anymore. I’m feeling very lost
not being able to communicate with others well anymore ever since my
secondary school days are over, the distance between my friends and I
slowly grew bigger to the point that I no longer feel comfortable with
anyone anymore.
I feel that my personality has been locked away(not trying to be edgy lol)
At this point I don’t know which is the real me anymore as I feel that I cant
express who I really am anymore especially with those groups of friends
of mine. I no longer know which is the real me anymore, I’m just trying my
best to be liked by my friends and I find it really hard to achieve that. Not
gonna lie I feel like shit almost every morning I wake up knowing that I no
longer have a proper friend that I can talk to anymore trying to be myself
is making my life so tough, especially without real friends lol. What a shitty
life I have haha.
I HATE CHEESY AND I HAD
A VERY CHEESE DREAM
I puke at people who are overly romantic and cheesy, hated the fact that I fell in love myself about two years
ago. However, yesterday I woke up laughing of happiness because I dreamt I got married. It was freaking
beutiful and my whole family was there, happy and proud. I couldnt stop myself from googeling wedding
rings still in bed after I woke up and found the perfect one. I never told my bf about this, who is against
marriage, and was still sleeping next to me. But I cant shake the feeling off now.