OMG Digital Magazine | 327 | Thursday 4 October 2018 • PAGE 6
SoulFood
How to Fall Back in Love With Your Life BY MEGHAN CAMP
“ If we look at the world with a love of life , the world will reveal its beauty to us .” ~ Daisaku Ikeda Ever found yourself in a rut , just waiting for some force of the Universe to pull you out ? When ennui sets in , it can be hard to find a way back into the light , but it typically takes a series of events and choices for us to be living a life out of sync with our personal goals , values , and passions .
Last year , I found myself in one of these ruts . After spinning my wheels for quite some time , I realized my so-called attempts at improving my circumstances were a farce — I was just exhausting my energy waiting for a savior to come to my rescue . Finally , when that savior never came , I snapped out of it and acknowledged I don ' t live in some fantasy novel , and can ' t invoke , by sheer will , a knight in shining armor . As Alice Sebold wrote in her memoir , Lucky , “ You save yourself or you remain unsaved .” At the time , I was in a job I had long outgrown . A job that no longer provided challenge , growth , or even companionship . This alone had come to impact everything else in my life .
Spending solitary day after solitary day was taking its toll , zapping my energy . By the end of the day , I no longer had anything left and didn ' t want to do the things I normally enjoyed , like yoga or meeting with friends . I even struggled to regularly apply to new positions , disappointed and despairing with each rejection .
Since I had just completed my masters program , I felt even more frustrated at my prospects . Had I just wasted three years of my life pursuing a degree that didn ' t fit with my values or goals ? Would I need to go to school all over again ? Too many unanswered questions left me feeling hopeless and unmotivated .
Then I met Hazel , a career coach I instantly connected with . It took me a few months , but I finally called her to schedule a session . Hazel helped me work through my self-limiting beliefs , determine my values — and value — and recognize that I could live authentically right now . I didn ' t have to start from scratch .
HERE ' S WHAT I LEARNED :
1 . Take the long way home . Sometimes it takes a literal change in perspective to change your mental perspective . During a week when my car was in the shop , I decided to walk home instead of catching the bus .
It was raining outside , and the walk was at least seven miles , but I had nowhere to be . Some of the roads I took were roads I ' d never taken before and some I ' d driven many times . All of them were new to me that day .
When I first moved to Denver , I walked everywhere , and everything was magical because it was new and special and offered up so much possibility . After being here for three years , the novelty had worn off and it was familiar — and the magic and possibility I felt at twenty-four seemed to have worn off with it .
This walk brought me back the basics and opened my heart back up to the magic . I didn ' t have to move to a new place , a place that would also inevitably become home and lose its magic if I let it . I just had to change my perspective .
When we get bored or restless , we don ' t necessarily have to move on . By taking the long way home , I fell back in love with my town , and by changing my physical perspective , I was able to see all of the possibilities that had been there all along .
2 . Move . I highly encourage movement to be a part of your daily life . Like anyone else , I can and will find excuses not to get outdoors or to yoga , but when I do , I feel recharged , centered , and empowered . Movement does this faster and better than anything else I ' ve found .
There ' s a funny saying that if you stand on your head for a few minutes every day , you ' ll change your perspective . I think this goes movement , too . When you shift your focus through movement , you start to see things a little differently , and the possibilities open up again .
3 . Surround yourself with the right people . There ' s nothing wrong with relating to people or venting every now and again , but it ' s also important to surround yourself with people and conversations that leverage enthusiasm , excitement , and satisfaction . Spend time with people who build you up , see and encourage your strengths , and who are , themselves , living authentically .
Energy is contagious , and if you ' re around positive energy and speaking with others in terms of positivity , you ' ll begin to restructure your thinking , and , ultimately , the way you see and experience the world around you .
4 . Be present . I know , I know — this one ' s been said before . But it can ' t be said enough . One of the main reasons people feel dissatisfaction with their life is because they ' re missing it . When we ' re not present , we become a little numb .
Taking in this very moment as it is , truly engaging — rather than living in your head , thinking about what comes next , or brooding ( or pining ) over what has past — can really heighten your appreciation and keep you from feeling that sense of emptiness that results from living somewhere other than the here and now .
You may even be surprised by how easy it is to learn new things or remember pieces of information when you start to fully tune in .
5 . Identify your values . I had to identify human connection as one of my top values before I realized there was nothing wrong with me just because I couldn ' t work in isolation . Once I recognized what was vital to my emotional well-being , I could pursue a life that ensured my values were a part of my daily world . What are your values ? We often admire others and think we should be doing what they are doing to be successful and satisfied with our lives . In actuality , we probably admire them because they are living out their own truth . Authenticity is attractive , not quality X , Y or Z .
Look within , not to others , to find your values ; once you do , figure out how they can be put into action so you are living your most authentic life , and start taking steps , large or small , to make them your reality .
6 . Serve others . Ever notice how a little time in your head can help clarify things , while too much time just makes everything murkier ? Get out of there , already !
I hate to say it , but we ( and I include myself in this statement ) are a bit of a self-absorbed society . When we ' re always thinking about me , myself and I , we become quickly dissatisfied . Maybe it ' s too much time spent with unproductive thoughts or a lack of connectedness , but this self-absorption can quickly bring us down .
The surest way to stop thinking about yourself is to start thinking about someone else . When you do something for someone else — out of love , compassion or connectedness — not obligation , you might find you ’ ve forgotten your troubles , and life actually feels fuller , more meaningful .
I believe we are all connected and thus all have our own roles to play in which we contribute to the collective good . When we connect to that role , we simultaneously connect to our purpose and to each other , filling up that hollowness we can get when we ' re not feeling so in love with our life .
Falling back in love with your life requires a little determination and reflection , but mostly it ’ s about letting go and just tuning in — to your most authentic self and to the world and people around you .