OMG Digital Magazine | 325 | Thursday 13 September 2018 • PAGE 11
Relationship
10 HABITS OF COUPLES IN STRONG AND HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS
BY SARA ALTSCHULE
What makes for a healthy romantic relationship differs from couple to couple . Forming a trusting and positive partnership takes effort and time . And unfortunately , it doesn ’ t just happen overnight . For any relationship to grow strong and stay strong , you need to put in some work . Below are some habits that will help create and maintain a happy and healthy twosome .
Communication
Communication is key . It is one of the most important qualities a healthy relationship . However , not everyone knows how to communicate properly ... or even communicate at all . Happy and healthy couples have this game down . They vocalize their love for one another , saying “ I love you ” often and offering compliments . They also discuss the bad instead of sweeping issues under the rug . In order to move forward and grow , you two need to be able to truly talk about your feelings . No matter how awkward or uncomfortable it feels , it will make for a longlasting and fulfilling relationship .
Respect
Aretha Franklin sang a whole song about it , so you know it ’ s got to be important . Respecting your partner comes in many forms . Maintaining a joyful relationship means respecting your partner ’ s time , heart , character , and trust . However , there are many things people do in relationships that can break down respect , like name-calling , talking negatively about the other to friends or family , and / or threatening to leave the relationship .
Quality Time , Not Quantity
It ’ s all about quality over quantity . It doesn ’ t matter how much time you and your partner spend together . The most important part is about the quality of this time . There ’ s a huge difference between having dinner at a table while talking about your day at work , versus having dinner while sitting on a couch watching the latest episode of The Voice . It ’ s fine to zone out together and enjoy distractions , but it ’ s crucial to make sure you two are still engaging and spending quality time together to maintain a deep connection .
Time Apart
Spending time together with your partner is important . But just as important is spending time apart . Being able to do your own things and remain independent is vital . When couples spend too much time together , it can create an unhealthy codependence . Maintaining healthy boundaries and some autonomy will make for a longlasting partnership .
Love Languages
Gary Chapman came up with the notion that men and women have five love languages . People have unique ways of feeling loved . There are words of affirmation , receiving gifts , quality time , acts of service , and physical touch . It ’ s important to know which love language speaks to you , along with your partner . Telling each other what makes you feel loved and special helps both of you stay connected . Furthermore , make sure you are attending to your partner ’ s love language consistently .
The Five Love Languages : How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate , $ 3.99 , Amazon
Appreciation
Often , we forget to let other people in our lives know that we appreciate them . We think it , but we don ' t remember to show it . This occurs in our romantic relationships as well . Show your special someone that you love him or her . This could be done with words , cards , flowers , acts of kindness , or more . Remember , a flower a day keeps the fights at bay . Okay , maybe not every day , but you get the point .
Positive Vs . Negative
Sometimes , we get caught up in the negative . We hate our jobs , are annoyed with our friends , and our boyfriend or girlfriend is getting on our last nerve . Uh-oh , have we been drinking too much of that half-empty glass ? It ’ s vital that we look at our partner ’ s positive qualities , in contrast to the negative . Nobody is perfect , and that includes our significant other . So instead of focusing on the bad , let ' s make a conscious effort to look at the good .
Choose Your Battles
There are arguments to be had in every relationship . It ’ s crucial to bring issues to the forefront , and work through the hard times together . However , I don ’ t think arguing over your SO using your favorite coffee cup should be one of those . Choose your battles wisely , because people in happy and healthy relationships do .
Sex
Let ’ s talk about sex , baby . Let ’ s also talk about how important it is in cultivating a flourishing relationship . Sex is simple . The more you have it , the more you want it . The other side of that is true as well . The less you have it , the less you want it — and , unfortunately , the less you ' ll feel connected to your partner . Keep your sex life alive and interesting . " Spicing it up " is not just meant for the kitchen .
No Comparisons
The grass isn ’ t always greener on the other side . Or even if it is , it might not be the kind of grass you would like . We often compare our lives to those of others — what jobs people have , their homes , their clothes . And with the help of social media , we tend to compare our relationships as well . But the happiest of couples don ’ t look to see what the grass looks like on the other side . They are happy with the view out their own front door .
Want more of Bustle ' s Sex and Relationships coverage ? Check out our new podcast , I Want It That Way , which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship , and find more on our SoundCloud page .