LIFESTYLE
GREAT PARENTS HAVE GREAT SEX
sex is not serving you . Dump your need to be wined and dined and just do it . The truth is that if you want to feel more connected to your spouse , you need to connect more with your spouse . Sex is a really great way to create more connection . Use it .
Photo courtesy of Katie Nugent Photography . www . katienugent . com
Since becoming a parent , how many articles , blogs , books and health journals have you read offering tips on being a better parent ? It seems there is new information on this topic daily and it can get down right overwhelming trying to be proactive and ‘ do the right thing ’ as a parent . What if I told you that one of the most important things you can work on as a parent is something that you already know how to do . It ’ s actually the thing that got you into this whole parenting ‘ mess ’ in the first place ! That ’ s right - SEX can be the key to a happy household .
The importance of maintaining a close and intimate connection with our partner as we ride the roller coaster of parenthood is often overlooked and put on the back burner , but a healthy sex life can have a powerful impact on our actions as parents . Sex is a sure fire way to re-connect with your significant other and yet many , many parents can attest to having gone through some serious dry spells or full on draughts in the bedroom .
To start having the kind of sex that leads to better parenting , kick these four thoughts out of your bedroom :
I am not in the mood
The biggest lie going on in many bedrooms is that you have to first feel an intimate connection in order to have sex . That romance novel way of thinking about
Sex is unnatural and not that good
Get out of your head and let your body do the work . The truth is that the only way to start having better sex is to start having more sex . If you feel you are out of practice , it is really important that you get back in the game . Not having a sex life leads to lack of intimate connection which leads to lack of communication . If you are feeling lonely in your relationship , or you think your spouse might be , commit to getting back into bed together . Your kids win in the long run ; happier parents are much better parents .
I don ’ t feel sexy
That is because you are not having enough sex ! The act of sex and the biological responses that come along with it actually help our bodies produce more beneficial hormones , which in turn leads to better health in a number of ways . More feel good hormones , like oxytocin for women , reduces stress and has the same physical benefits as exercise . If you want to improve your health and get into good shape , commit to having more sex .
He / She doesn ’ t deserve it
Stop making sex all about the other person . You are responsible for your sex life . Work on making sex about you and your commitment to the many benefits , such as connection and communication . When you use sex as a weapon or a reward for good behaviour you are making it about the other person . The fact is , you are together and you have children . The benefit of being in a monogamous relationship is that you have a guaranteed sex partner . What does it really cost you to have sex with your spouse when you are not particularly pleased with him or her ? Nothing ! Just do it . Do it for you and do it for your kids .
Contributed by Beth Veenkamp of Constructing Life Coaching .
2013 Okanagan4Kids . com Baby & Toddler Guide 22