oh!!! wo-(man-ia)
edition 5 july‘2014
The Weigh(t)ing game - A teenager’s story
Whenever I watched ‘twilight’ – the
movie, I hated that bland, expressionless
- Bella Swan. Why would Edward Cullen
fall for her? Whenever I saw her in those
hot dress and gowns, I thought, wow!
She has a great bod, she can
wear anything.
lose and gain weight so easily? Is there a
trick for it? I want a genie, i am so
desperate to lose these flabs and look
fabulous not flab-ulous.
I did reduce 20 kgs, but by then
my guy was gone, to some slim
Unlike me, the umm... plumpish,
fattish - geek, who finds nothing
in the huge malls of India to fit
myself into. Maybe, I will get my
Edward, if I shed a few... few
more.... few more dozens of
pounds off my fat self!
girl. That made me all the more
furious, I went crazy. I had to
become size zero for him to love
me, and I decided, I would. My
starvation continued and my
activities increased, health drinks
gave me enough energy to walk
and stay up and try to study. But
mostly I was so drained, I slept, I
slept a lot.
Hermione Granger. She deserved
to be with Cedric Diggory.... the
‘aah’ness it would create. Sigh!
Then Bebo dumped Sasha.... and
went to Saifu.... she dumped lots
of kilos too, along with that. She
got in the SIZE ZERO fad. I had
enough weight issues already
and, people were flesh over
bones and that’s what they
called a perfect body... duh! It
was trending.
Often i wonder, are fads important or
acceptance of our own self? But then
the clothes in vogue are according to
these celebs and their designers. I
want to fit into hot clothes and look
hot, not like a stuffed toy :(
I read and read, and I realized, excess of
junk is bad, I can’t quit junk but yes I
have resolved to reduce it, and have a
good healthy diet. But this happened
after I fell in love with this totally
awesome guy. Everyone loved him, so
did I. My first school time crush. But I
knew he won’t love the flabby bird that I
was. I was so determined to make him
mine; I joined the gym - rigorous
schedule and lots of dieting. But I wasn’t
losing much. I realized that eating won’t
help, i didn’t want to lose him, but yes
this excess of mass had to go. I starved
myself. I lived on water and health
drinks. I skipped, I cycled and I gymed.
But food? No Food! It helped, from
3digits on scale; I did get down to 2
digits.
I am so confused, I want to be slim and
fit in clothes and be trendy, but I want to
eat too.
I contemplated and I did join gym, did
Aerobics, Zumba, Yoga and the artificial
slimming techniques. But I am not able
to lose enough weight. How do actresses
But I din treat myself. I starved, the little
food my mom stuffed into me – vomited
that out! No sugar no salt, no food. I had
my boards and i had to study too. But
this craziness took its toll. I fell
unconscious in the middle of a physical
training class. I was rushed to the school
That’s so unfair. I love food, I hog on it
like a pig. French fries and burgers are
my life-line. But then, i can’t really have
them all the while.
But now, we have so many Bollywood
divas who are above the standard
anorexic numbers on the scales. We also
have plus sizes in malls. Maybe that’s
the new fad. But will this always be
according to such temporary fads?
med, they gave me glucose. I was fine
for a while.
Even this episode did not dampen my
high spirits, I continued.
9
Boards started, I knew I would
flunk; everything I studied seemed
so distant. But I didn’t care, I just
had to look good and slim and
wear all those awesome clothes
and be with my guy to make all
girls go green. Yes, that was
important.
But my stars perhaps did not like
the new, slim, crazy me. I fell ill,
terribly ill and fell unconscious
again, just after the second last exam.
I was hospitalized and had all kind of
drips injected into my veins, my parents
were crying. My siblings had come home
tensed from their distant schools and
colleges.
I realized how stupid I had been. I
created problems not only for myself,
but for no good reason I panicked one
and all. These were my people, who
loved me, who didn’t see me as fat, or
dark, or stupid. They loved me
unconditionally. Alas, I didn’t love myself
enough.
That was the day I realized, the
importance of loving yourself, loving
your people. Loving food you eat, eating
wisely, being in control - of yourself,
your body, your food and health.
But most importantly, accepting
yourself, your imperfections and
knowing that you are a blessed soul!