OH! Magazine - Australian Version June 2017

Tip 3. Don’t share your feelings Tip 4. Don’t try to control your partner This one gets most women every time. So many of them believe they should be looking for someone they can share their feelings with. The problem is that too often this is used as an excuse to dump all the negativity of the day onto your partner. Do you like to be controlled? Why would you assume your partner would like it any more than you do? As an male employer of mine once said, “When I’m up to my waist in the swamp, I don’t want to hear about your alligators.” Why not share the funny, the weird, the bizarre things that happen in your day, so you can laugh about them. Wouldn’t that create more lightness and fun in your relationship? If the relationship in question is with a girlfriend, then sharing feelings might be appropriate if you’re both interested. (It’s a trait women are neurologically wired for, but not all women are interested.) Tip 5. Don’t blame your partner It’s tempting to find someone, anyone, to blame for things that go wrong in our lives. Bottom line is: you created it all. Dumping the blame on the nearest person, your partner, may momentarily make you feel better—but is it kind or true? Will it really create the good feelings you’re looking for in your partner? Tip 6. Don’t give up yourself How much of yourself do you have to give up for your relationship to work? Can that possibly be sustainable? If you stop being you, where does the person your partner fell in love with or became friends with go? Following these 6 Dos and 6 Don’ts can get you a long way towards creating relationships that work for you—where you can have and share your unique voice and contribution to the world! Dr Kacie Crisp is a Right Voice for You Facilitator, a world-wide program that is part of Access Consciousness which presents tools that can allow you to have your voice heard and appreciated in relationships of all kinds. She is also the author of the Little Black Book on Relationships about her 30-year relationship with her husband, David Caddy. She and David have presented classes on relationships all over the world. Learn more at www.rightvoiceforyou.com OH! MAGAZINE ( JUNE 2017 ) 27

OH! Magazine - Australian Version June 2017 | Page 27