OH! Magazine - Australian Version August 2016 - Page 11

( Exercise Emotional Fitness ) ) Adherence MOVING FORWARDS HEIDI DI SANTO DESPITE SELF-DOUBT Emotional fitness expert Heidi Di Santo helps you move through self-doubt towards success. elf-doubt, low self-esteem and a lack of confidence are common feelings, but the thing is, they are completely normal and virtually everyone experiences them at some point in time in their lives. S There's often a tendency to think that there's something wrong with us when we have those 'not good enough' feelings, or 'lack of' emotions. But, as mentioned above, these emotions are completely normal – even among the most successful people in the world. There's a famous American Indian fable of two wolves, where an old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. He tells the boy: 'A fight is going on inside me. It is a terrible fight between two wolves. One is evil – he is angry, jealous, doubting and full of self-pity and negativity. The other is good – he is hopeful, loving, caring, generous and looks on the bright side of life. The same fight is going on inside you (and inside every other person, too).' The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, 'Which wolf will win?' To which, the Cherokee simply replied, 'The one you feed.' The same applies to you and your life. When you have self-doubt, you can focus on the doubt and let it make you feel small and incapable, which will lead to a lack of action and self-pity. The alternative option is to acknowledge the doubt and then keep going. Keep focusing on your goal and asking yourself 'what can I do today to help me move in the direction of my dreams and desires?' Ultimately, it's up to you as to which wolf you feed! Taking action on a daily or regular basis is the key. The famous saying, 'the journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step' really applies here. Once you've set your goal, it may freak you out when you think about how you're going to achieve it, so I suggest you don't focus too often on the end destination! Instead, break your goal down into small manageable pieces and just do one thing each day to help you achieve it; you'll be surprised how daily action really adds up. You should also be aware that comparisons outside of yourself are really dangerous. Whenever you compare yourself to someone else, you'll always feel 'better than' or 'worse than,' which is a yucky way to live. This is because comparisons often make you feel lousy and can grind your action to a complete stop. I regularly fall into the 'comparison trap', but once I'm aware it's happening I talk lovingly to myself; it's a gentle reminder that the only truly important comparison is with myself. I ask myself 'have I made progress and am I closer to my goal today compared to when I started?' If the answer is 'yes', then that's all that matters. For more information about this and other emotional fitness topics visit www.heidi.com.au YOU CAN CONTACT HEIDI VIA: Web: heidi.com.au Facebook: Heidi-Di-Santo-EmotionalFitness-Specialist-299600633422574/ AUGUST 2016 (OH! MAGAZINE) 11