Oasis Magazine - Cairns & Tropical North Queensland Issue 25 - Aug|Sept 2018 | Page 9

Gettin ’ by on my OWN SUPPLY WARNER’S CORNER DAVE WARNER Star 102.7 Before I get to that retirement stage over again. That appealed to me, the simple one that perfectly sums up of life, where I’ll spend my days simplicity of it, not too much thought who I am and what I do. Like the Fat required. He’s outside in the Flower Man at Rusty’s or the ABC eating at buffets, yelling ‘get off fresh air with a beautiful television show Two Men in a Tinny, my lawn’ and firing off angry Cairns sunrise as his it is what it says. So down the track letters to the editor about backdrop watching in years to come when you’re bus timetables, while unbearably fit and heading out for a family picnic and signing off in capitals YOU NOW HAVE happy people and you feel like some fruit keep an eye with words like OUT- TO BE THE SAME their puppies bounce out for the Paw Paw Bastard on the RAGED, GUTFUL and AGE AS YODA TO into their day. To side of the road. Think I might even NOT HAPPY JAN, I’m LEAVE THE paraphrase Jay Z, I’m expand into juices and to stay on going to semi-retire. (WORK) FORCE sure he’s got 99 theme launch with a watermelon problems but the job and cauliflower cocktail called The It’s a long way off because Melancholy. ain’t one. I’d like to the government keep think he drives around pushing back the retirement But don’t be fooled by goalposts. You now have to be the all day just popping out the name, the pawpaw same age as Yoda to leave the (work) palm puns in his head, I’M GOING TO SET bastard on the side of force. (If you can’t be arsed like the movie ‘On UP A ROADSIDE the road is gettin’ by Golden Frond’ starring googling, ‘900 he is’). FRUIT STALL Peter Fronda. on his own supply. SPECIALISING IN Living his best life on So what does semi-retirement look TROPICAL FRUITS simple terms and that like? I was watching a bloke on the So with that sort of makes him one of the Nard recently drive around on his simplicity in mind, I’m richest blokes on the ATV quad bike thingy. He’d pull up going to set up a roadside street. next to a fallen palm frond, pick it up fruit stall in semi-retirement and put it in the back. And then he’d specialising in tropical fruits and drive to the next one and do it all I’ve already picked out my name, a Now GET OFF MY LAWN.