Nursing Review Issue 4 July-August 2021 | Page 19

specialty focus doubting yourself and there ’ s the imposter syndrome ; and then right at the end there , you ’ ve got an amazing skillset , but you ’ ve also forgotten how hard it was to get there .”
specialty focus doubting yourself and there ’ s the imposter syndrome ; and then right at the end there , you ’ ve got an amazing skillset , but you ’ ve also forgotten how hard it was to get there .”
Listening to Georgie ’ s story , I think she ’ s being humble and it ’ s more of a working class attitude : having a go and working hard , coupled with a bit of cheekiness and some confidence .
And she brought that same attitude ( or arrogance ) to writing her first book , Off The Charts , a book full of laughout-loud stories from the front-line of the hospital system .
“ I don ’ t know what it is , but it ’ s like a self-belief that I can probably do anything if I want to . Because it ’ s what you tell other people , that you can be anything . I can see it in my friends who don ’ t think they can do things ,” she says .
Compared with the pressure of nursing , writing a book and performing jokes is not life and death , she says .
“ We ’ re all a culmination of circumstances that we ’ ve had so far . So whatever nursing has given me , because it ’ s been a huge chunk of my life , it ’ s left me with this kind of [ attitude ], we ’ re here once , just do it . Don ’ t put it off .”
And she applies that enjoyment of life to most things .
She writes about the dichotomy of being a health professional , but not really being the most healthy person around .
“ I ’ ve seen what people can do to themselves over a lifetime and still be stood up , and I ’ m like , ‘ I can do more ’,” she says .
“ I mean , I ’ m a big girl and that contributed to me needing knee replacements .”
Or “ re-stumping ” as she puts it in the book .
“ I needed knee replacements by 45 . One of the factors , one of the maybe three factors , but the one I could control , I never did : it was worth it to me to go through major surgery and get the familysize pizza .
“ But it ’ s different throughout your career . Like right at the beginning , people set off very well and they come in on night shifts with their little crudite box of chopped up veg and they might section themself off three of the Haribo . You know ?
“ And then in general , or for me anyway , there ’ s the whole middle years , where you ’ re just so busy . You ’ re looking after so many people outside of work , so many people in work , and it ’ s a little bit of a martyr role that you take on .
“ You ’ ll be working a shift , whilst everyone else is asleep , and then they come home and they ’ re awake and they ’ ve got things to do , and you ’ re always putting everyone else first .
“ That ’ s generally when I think most people reward themselves with the whole bag of Haribo , and the bottles of wine and just the fun things .”
My conversation with Georgie gets like that at points . Her observations come in the form of a down-to-earth self-love guide .
She is , after all , an emotional black belt , or so she tells us .
“ That sounds arrogant , doesn ’ t it ?” she asks . I nod , going along with the joke .
“ I do think I have that , I think , emotional IQ amongst people who ’ ve seen what we see in hospitals . It ’ s quite impressive .”
The conversation pivots off that point to her general ideas on the human condition . She doesn ’ t believe there is such a thing as a bad person , “ I think everybody ’ s a set of circumstances that got them to that point right now ,” she says . Or how there is no such thing as angry . “ Frustration is huge in hospitals . Like you come in , this is the sixth time you ’ ve been in with these unbearable stomach pains and we still don ’ t know what it is , and we ’ re just going to fast you for a few days and you feel better , then we send you home and it starts again . It ’ s so frustrating .
“ There is no such thing as angry . I ’ ve seen so many angry people . It ’ s never just angry . You ’ re frustrated or you ’ re hungry .
“ So , yeah , there ’ s something in everybody to like . I ’ ve forgotten even where this started now .” So did I . That ’ s very much a throughline for the book . It ’ s a scattering of common sense musings punctuated by funny stories and ideas .
She ’ s like your funny colleague making you laugh at the nurses station , or your mate holding court at the pub . It seems natural and unrehearsed .
And like all comedians , she sees life differently to the rest of us . She can sum things up simply and hilariously .
Like her tale of the three stages of nursing .
It all starts with the ‘ dolphins ’, or freshly minted grad nurses .
“ Your version of care is verging on Munchausen ,” she says of the dolphins .
“ It ’ s like being part of an army , and the word of mouth in nurses is insanely good .
Then on to the ‘ penguins ’. Nurses with 7 to 30 years on the job , “ still beautiful , but just from a distance ”.
And then you have the ‘ orcas ’, the nurses with 30 years-plus experience . “ Majestic beasts ” she says , not dangerous to humans , but the only mammal that regularly attacks dolphins .
She also writes about the nurses on nightshift (“ you can tell what year they started by their haircut and their music preference . Like it just stops . The pop culture stops at the second that they started the night shifts ”) and the time she threatened to shoot a patient who wouldn ’ t get back in bed .
She has stories of the time she got a less than loving sponge bath when she herself was a patient , or her love of bowel care , but her absolute hatred of the paperwork that comes after it . Or just paperwork in general .
Or her love of old people , or the time her husband woke up with one massively enlarged testicle .
Georgie ’ s life is an open book , if you ’ ll excuse the pun .
During the first wave of the pandemic , when all of the arts and nightlife suddenly came to a stop , Georgie had a short stint back on the wards , but for the most part , these days all the world ’ s a stage for Georgie .
Thanks to that arrogance she now makes her living making people laugh , and she loves it .
But she does miss her fellow nurses , her “ troop ”, when she ’ s on the comedy scene . She credits them with supporting her on her comedy journey .
“ It ’ s like being part of an army , and the word of mouth in nurses is insanely good ,” she says .
“ I ’ ve not been in hospital for two or three years . I ’ ve been on the cruises doing comedy , I ’ ve been at festivals . Literally , I work for an hour a night , daytime drink . Just the cushiest life ,” she laughs .
“ I was just having the loveliest time , I can ’ t tell you . It ’ s like it doesn ’ t always happen , this life , but when it does you ’ ve got to fucking grab it .” ■
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