Who would be the one to pull it
Daddy looked down at it and a tear
out? What would be the reason and
fell with his gaze. I picked the bottle
who against and why? Its intent
up, took a swig and handed it back.
was safety but its dreams were
something else.
Daddy’s been getting drunker
than he should. I don’t mind
“Hey, that’s mine.” He turned with
a fit of motorized flatulence and
lurched to the couch.
I left daddy and walked Luscious
because I don’t live with daddy
around my childhood. It was only
anymore. I’m in a cottage upstate.
blocks from where I grew up, a
But I do drive to visit daddy every
homelier, less manicured house.
weekend and every weekend he’s a
We went to the park I used to eat
little worse off.
lunch at to be alone. I didn’t like
He likes to mention the gun —
bring it up.
being around the other kids. Not
most of the time. “I needed breaks,
“Don’t make me get the gun,” he
Luscious.” Luscious’ scruffy white
told me the last time I showed up.
head was in a Wendy’s bag. “Did
It was eight in the morning and
you hear me? Luscious!” His head
he was holding a bottle of ale. It
popped out and looked at me
was spilling onto the clean, white
expectantly but when I couldn’t
marble floor, creating pools of cruel
think to say anything he put his
yellow at our feet as he spoke. “You
head where his head thought it
buy a gun, you gotta find something
should be.
to shoot with it. And Luscious needs
a walk.” He dropped the bottle,
landing it right side up at his feet.
65 | NOVUS | ISSUE ONE
I caught the man at my cottage, in
my home.
I bought the cottage fifteen years