This initially surprised me as it did
Barkley, but in the light of E.I. research, it
makes sense. So what is the day-to-day
emotional climate of your office and how
are you influencing that climate? How
could you become more resonant? First,
decide you truly want to be more emotionally intelligent and resonant.
If you want to grow your E.Q., here
are five questions to answer on a 1
(lowest) to 5 (highest) scale to get a
sense of your current E.Q.
Although highly subjective, this gives you
a beginning point in your journey toward
elevating your E.Q. Ask a close friend or coworker who’d give you an honest opinion
to do the same rating on you, then compare
scores.
1
2
What is my capacity for recognizing my feelings? In the heat
of the moment, am I aware of what
I’m feeling and can I label those
feelings?
What is my capacity for recognizing the feelings of others?
Again, in the heat of an event, do I
recognize the other’s feelings and
can I label and understand them?
Emotional Check-In
One great aid to those who are emotional
avoiders is a “Feelings Board”. A simple corkboard hangs near where we hold our A.M. huddle.
The days of the week are across the top and the
names of each team member down the left. On
the bottom is a legend:
n Yellow = On top of the world, warm & fuzzy
n Green = 80% of me is great, 20% is struggling
n Blue = Emotional today and need a hug
n Black = Emotional, but don’t need a hug!
n White = Give me space today
n Red = Feel bad – Parkers at fifty paces!
3
4
5
Do I use emotions to motivate
myself – or do emotions tend to
de-motivate or arrest my progress?
Do I manage emotions well in
myself – when I experience an
emotion, do I channel it in a positive way? Fear can be paralyzing… one must feel the fear,
express it and then act bravely.
Do I manage emotions well in
my relationships – or do emotions actually interfere in many of
my relationships?
Empathy
Empathy is sensing another’s emotions and
also understanding their perspective, then
taking an active interest in their concerns.
Transparency
Transparency (displaying honesty, integrity
and trustworthiness, disclosing your feelings) is an E.I. competency hallmark of star
leaders that we develop in all our clients.
That is not to say that we must always tell
one another how we are feeling. There are
times, especially in doctor-patient and doctor-staff interactions, that emotional disclosure could have a negative effect.
However, much more often, such disclosure has a strongly positive effect.
1
Friedman and Riggio, Journal of Non-Verbal Behavior
6, 1981, pp. 32 - 58
Bob Frazer, Jr.,
DDS, FACD, FICD
For 30 years,
Dr. Frazer lead a
highly successful
(top 2%) insurance
independent, relationship-based, values-driven dental practice.
He and his firm offer dentists a range of
transformational services: Applied Strategic
Planning, Emotional Intelligence training,
Performance Coaching, Wilderness Adventures,
Leadership Adventures, and a National
Study Club. Recognized as the foremost
authority in Applied Strategic Planning and
Emotional Intelligence in dentistry, he helps
dentists achieve lives of balance, fulfillment
and significance.
A masterful storyteller, Dr. Frazer shares how
to harness the powers of vision and emotional intelligence in one’s life and practice.
A pioneer in collaborative diagnosis, he and
his associates teach dental teams how to
interpret value so you patients routinely
choose your finest, most complete care.
He is a Fellow of the American and
International College of Dentists. Dr. Frazer
has presented more than 1000 programs
and published more than 50 articles in dental
journals including 20 articles on Emotional
Intelligence.
Contact Dr. Frazer at the email address
below for a com