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Kids, have your parents talked to you about " Stranger Danger "
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Have a calm, honest, age-appropriate conversation with your child about meeting strangers and avoiding potential dangers. Here’ s how.
We’ ve all encountered the child at the playground, or in the mall, who won’ t respond to a friendly comment or question, no matter how innocent its intent. We can only assume that the child ' s well-meaning parents instilled in them a fear of strangers in their attempt to protect their child. Although actual incidents of abductions and overtures from strangers are statistically rare, it’ s natural for parents to want their children to feel safe, secure, and cared for, so headlines about missing children strike fear in their hearts. The dilemma is this: How can we educate children to be alert to possible dangers and at the same time encourage them to feel safe and confident in exploring their world?
The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children maintains that it is much more beneficial to children to help them build the confidence and self-esteem they need to stay as safe as possible in any potentially dangerous situation they encounter, rather than teaching them to be wary of strangers or“ on the lookout” for a particular type of person. Based on what we know about those who harm children, danger to children is greater from someone they or their family know than from a complete stranger.
Although talking about potential dangers with children may not be pleasant, it pays off in terms of prevention. If you discuss“ what if” scenarios in a calm, age-appropriate manner, you strengthen your child’ s ability to face the world with confidence and self-assurance.
Age-Specific Safety Strategies
Conversations should begin at an early age, with information tailored to the age of your child and adjusted over time. Discuss safety issues in a positive, open and reassuring manner, modeling a calm but realistic problem-solving style. A matter-offact approach will make your child aware that he is capable of dealing with life’ s realities. Even the youngest child can be taught simple rules about personal safety, such as his whole name, address, and phone number, the names of his parents, who to call in an emergency, and how to use the phone to call 911. Here are some points to keep in mind:
• Tweens and teens( ages 10 and up) become more capable of judging the consequences of a potentially dangerous situation. They are likely to be in unsupervised situations more often and are influenced by their peers, and therefore, they may think they should act“ cool.” Your child still benefits from ongoing discussions of risks, using real-life situations as examples.
Being Aware of and Available to Your Child
In any discussion of potential dangers your child may face, it’ s important to consider your own child’ s personality and temperament. Some children are naturally cautious in new situations. Others may respond more readily to friendly overtures and promises, and therefore need more guidance. Some parents may be reluctant to point out potential dangers, but keeping children uninformed is not an option. The effects of the media are powerful, and children of all ages watch television, hear news reports, and listen to adult conversations.
Your child needs to know that their parents, caregivers, teachers, or other trusted adults are there to help if he has doubts, questions, or concerns about his safety. When sensational events about children are
32 | North Dakota Spring / Summer 2014 | abusemagazine. org
Source: www. scholastic. com / parents / resources / article / socialemotional-skills / talking-about-stranger-safety