MORE RELAXED
Becoming more relaxed and enjoying your life is up to you. I know I’ m not telling you any news here and I know it isn’ t easy to master becoming a chillaxed person but it’ s also not impossible.
When I was a teenager most people around me used to say that I’ m a very quiet person. They didn ' t say I’ m observing things first. They didn’ t think I’ m just cool. They kept saying that I was shy, quiet and insecure. Well, they were right because I was more insecure and less experienced than now. But here we are, more than a decade later and I feel very flattered when friends, family, colleagues, and even recruiters on the phone comment that I seem to be a laid back person. Thank you, yes. So, why is that? How can I be“ chillaxed " although I’ ve been risking a lot recently? Again, that comes with experience. I’ m not 20 any more. I’ ve figured out some things.
I’ ve been working on my professional career path mostly with pushing myself into challenging situations. I gave up my financially secure status quo and chose trying something new over the stable lifestyle. Then I was thinking why the hell am doing this to me and once I was in the middle of the challenge 5
I didn ' t quit until I got to the point where I benefited from the hard work. I admit that I also looked a lot at others and wanted to proof to them I can be successful until I’ ve realised that this is not really me. I wanted to find my own way of success. The main thing that has changed is my thinking and my thinking starts with: Do I have to proof myself to someone? There are a few people, of course. But the one person that I want to impress all the time and to whom I want to proof that I’ m capable of achieving this and that, yes, that person is actually me. I pressured myself a lot but I’ ve found out that I have all the power to handle that pressure and change it.
Lucky me, my family is awesome because they educated me to be extremely independent from them. They also let me live my way. They’ ve never really judged me or pushed me to follow their example. Quite the opposite. They know I will make it. They know they can rely on me that I take care of myself. They taught me that I’ m responsible for every single step I’ m taking( however, they didn’ t necessarily showed me how to take that responsibility). I didn ' t like it when I was a teenager because I felt the heaviness on my shoulders and sometimes I thought I might crack under that pressure. But I’ ve learned early on how to deal with it. This summer, I took another risky decision and instead of being terrified and calling me naive, my family ensured that they completely understand and they trusted me to do the right thing. And just in case something goes really wrong they would be there for me, trying to help out wherever they can. That’ s when I’ ve realised where an important part of my relaxedness comes from.
I’ ve changed not only jobs, I’ ve changed friends, cities, opinions and countries. I haven’ t had a shocking culture shock yet( besides the month before Brexit) but I definitely had my little culture shocks here in Europe. And they taught me to calm down as well. Forget about the perfectionist in you, I told myself. When moving to London and Madrid / Marbella I really had to stop complaining about chaotically organised colleagues, about the missing double glazing of windows, about weird heating systems in winter, about missing reliability and honesty, safety, cleanness, even about illogic traffic lights, about unpunctuality and so on. I had to stop comparing and start just going with it. Biggest challenge ever, I tell you and a never-ending challenge. But once I mastered my thoughts my days got so much more beautiful. It’ s true what they say about the thoughts. If