PEER LIAISON UPDATE
‘ Peer ’ -ing into darkness
MIKE PELLEGRINO
62 NEW JERSEY COPS ■ JULY 2016
Make this a page you don ’ t skim . Tear it out , in fact . Make copies and hang them in the break room and in your locker . It might save your brother or sister ’ s life . Even though you ’ ve heard and read the message before – at the 2016 State PBA Mini-Convention … in the cover story of the April issue of NJ Cops Magazine … at each Out of Darkness Walk …
Even though the message is tough to hear , isn ’ t hearing about the latest PBA member suicide – two , in fact , this month alone – even worse ?
So here ’ s the message again . And the State PBA Peer Liaison Committee will continue to share it again and again .
We have so much to live for , and there are so many resources to get us the help we need . Apparently , officers aren ’ t reaching for the phone , so they reach for other things – alcohol , drugs – because that takes away the problems in the short-term , but they come down from that and the d problem hasn ’ t gone away .
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Then finally , in their mind , there is no other option .
But there are options .
We can provide the resources but people have to want the help for it to be effective .
The stigma is gone . We ’ ve identified it and we see members are getting the help they need . It ’ s just not everybody who ’ s getting the help they need . Eight out of 10 people can put their issues into perspective ; the rest is the percentage we ’ re trying to reach , because even one more is one more too many .
We attempt to reach people at meetings , but I see it myself – members will walk out of the room because they think it ’ s a good time for a bathroom break . I get it . It ’ s just the way it is . Honestly , until you need us , you don ’ t think about us .
Are you a State Delegate and don ’ t know what to do when you see a sister or brother in need of help or reaching out for help ? Call me at 609-352-3398 , any time . Maybe because there ’ s such a big turnover – we ’ re swearing in 20 new Delegates each meeting – there ’ s still lots of work to be done . And repetition is key .
We ’ re trying to have classes in towns across the state so members don ’ t have to come to the PBA office for peer assistance training with our clinical services team of Dr . Eugene Stefanelli , Dr . Michael Bizzarro and Cherie Castellano from Cop 2 Cop . I tried to put this info out but I only got two responses .
Get your Locals together . Get your County Conferences together . Then reach out to me . I want to have trainings in the south ; in the west ; everywhere . I want a couple where we bring together people from different areas . This has to be dealt with head-on and training is essential .
As law enforcement officers , we know what to look for – we can tell if someone is goofed out on heroin – but it ’ s hard to root out mental illness . We can ’ t jump inside someone ’ s head , but from a brother ’ s keeper perspective , members need to understand that even one little thing at work or in their personal lives can put someone in a bad place .
It ’ s important to talk to your partner in your patrol car . Find out what his or her likes are all about . Look to help them or take their minds off their problems by doing something fun with them . As stupid as that might sound , you have to reach out to that person . And let them know you ’ re going to follow up on a regular basis .
You have to follow up ; you have to be a friend . You can ’ t be too sensitive or too vigilant .
That ’ s what ’ s going to help . d