NJ Cops Dec18 | Page 89

HEALTH & WELLNESS Happy holidays? Not for all cops In an article by Mimi Ko and Shelby Grad, titled “Realities of Police Work Make Holidays Difficult for Officers,” the authors describe the holidays as a difficult time for cops. Law enforcement officers are accustomed to dealing with the darker side of life. But during the holiday season, the daily dose of human tragedy takes on an added dimension, making the job all the more difficult. CHERIE When I think about the holidays, it amazes me CASTELLANO that so many civilian families are able to take ex- Cop 2 Cop tended vacations and enjoy the season! Any law enforcement family is thrilled just to get the “big days” like Christmas Eve or New Year’s Eve off, depending on seniority, shift work or type of law enforcement. What I’ve noticed as a law enforcement family is that we cherish our time together off work but are so exhausted that it becomes a day of rest — if not, we go back to work more tired than before we had off! I also notice that many of our law en- forcement family/friends do the same thing; if we only have a few days off, we jam in every holiday activity imaginable, which never ends well! Too much of anything is not good, so celebrating the holidays in moderation is a good rule to follow. In my family, our traditions both spiritually and in our cul- ture bring me joy and peace. As an Italian American I love Christmas Eve, with the feast of the seven fishes all night long! Our family is big and loud and faith-filled, so the best mo- ments are our prayer circles, where we say what we are thank- ful for. We also sing happy birthday to Jesus and put on a play in the family room, where the kids reenact the Nativity with costumes and props! When the kids were little, it was a big hit; now that they are older, they begrudgingly go along because it is tradition. These holiday rituals and family time feed my soul, but then it is back to work. Often, law enforcement families think about how blessed we are because we know about the human suffering in our communities. Charity work and giving back happen both on a personal and professional level to sustain the joy of the season. Many of the AMAZING, charitable things cops do in the community during the holiday season is one “feel-good” el- ement that most officers share. For cops, giving back during the holidays in a formal way is a highlight because through your service as a law enforcement professional, you give back to the community daily but the holidays make your generos- ity more of an official event. So many local PBA offices do so much for kids in need that it is too much to quantify. It is a rare but affirming moment when someone thanks a cop or does an act of kindness for law enforcement, but ’tis the season when it actually can happen. Officers in the field say they must contend with an in- creased number of family fights, car accidents and child cus- tody disputes, along with the usual menu of crimes. According to psychologists and police counselors, the contrast between the holiday spirit and reality can seriously stress or depress officers. “Emotionally, everyone is so up. Then, they have to deal with the down side,” said Cullen Ellingburgh, an Orange County coroner’s deputy. “Those poles seem so far apart that it takes a toll.” Another officer added, “They want to be home with their families, but instead they are out here, refereeing fights. It’s not just something you can dispose of when you go home.” For law enforcement, the work intensifies as the approach- ing holidays heighten anxieties in households throughout their cities, and gatherings ignite family battles. Add alcohol to the mix and law enforcement officers have their hands full. And because the holidays are a time for reflection, officers — like anyone else — are susceptible to melancholy. For some officers, a tough holiday call might remind him or her of a similar situation in his or her past. “He might re- live the event…and feel those same feelings,” said one law enforcement leader. For some officers, getting through this period means putting on some defensive emotional armor. Some suggest that officers use the season to analyze their lives and decide what is most important to them. It’s essential to keep things in perspective and take some time to reflect on who you want to be and what you’re working for. With all this giving and taking of time, talent and gifts, where do you stand on the status of your holiday “spirit”? For many officers, core values and beliefs brought them into the career of law enforcement. When you take self-inventory, how does your heart and mind align with your service? My wish for you on behalf of all of us at Cop2Cop is that you are safe, loved and inspired this holiday season. Safe from harm, loved by your families and inspired by your call to serve. Remember, we here at Cop2Cop are forever grateful and only a phone call away at 1-866-267-2267. www.njcopsmagazine.com ■ DECEMBER 2018 89