with unmanageable tasks, and he has hope
that the baby steps will one day become
effortless strides.
Three years have passed since I found my
personal trainer. It took some patience and
struggle from my side to realise that he had
never really intended for me to start a diet,
When I am disheartened by the taunts of drop the pounds and live a happily-everthose around me, he is the one who looks size-ten-after. He knew from the beginning
beyond the epidermal layers and speaks to that this world is not a salad bar, and that for
my heart, saying, ‘Don’t stop now, we will the rest of my life I would be surrounded by
get through this together.’ He is the one who the temptation of the pakoras and biryanis
calls out from the crowd, pushing me to get of the world.
through that last round of sit ups, counting
down with me as I struggle through the pain I understand now, that this struggle will not
and the sweat of a high intensity workout. end until I have reached my grave. The only
thing my Shaykh required from me was my
When I just can’t resist that last slice
trust, my submission and my love, and in
of cheesy crust pizza, and everyone
return he showed me how to invite
around me is urging me ‘Go on, one
the mercy of Allah into my
slice won’t hurt’ it is his image
heart. Now, that fresh cream
in my mind- his reassuring
cake of sin, no longer looks
glance, watching over me,
as appetizing as it used
reminding me what I
to.
have to keep away
from.
Through his
commitment
That
is
to me, I can
what I find
see the counter
my source of
on my treadmill
encouragement in.
telling me that, yes, I
At the end of the week,
am in fact burning the
when the time comes to
calories away, even though
evaluate the calorie intake, it’s
sometimes it seems I am running
my personal trainer that I hand
on the spot. When the pounds of
over my food diary to. He doesn’t
disobedience begin to drop, I know I
tease, he doesn’t belittle. He doesn’t
have him to thank. I want to show him
humiliate me regarding that Friday night how much he means to me. My Spiritual
take-out. He doesn’t order me to get back Guide, who pulled me out from the abyss
on the treadmill. He doesn’t punish me of my wretched existence and swathed me
with a hundred sit-ups. He simply turns to with his love and acceptance, when all
a fresh page of my food diary and says, ‘Let’s others would have despised me and cast
move on’. This is where I feel a nameless me aside had they