Eunice never let go of the conviction that her rejection by the Curtis was an expression of racial prejudice . Had she been white , she was convinced , they would have offered her a place and her route to recognition as a classical piano star would have been assured . But of course , she wanted to be the first African-American classical piano star , so the ironies constantly rebound . It ’ s worth dwelling on this moment , so important was it to what followed . It is instinct with Nina Simone ’ s character and self-image that the only explanation she could not countenance for the Curtis refusal was her own lack of talent and that the most likely was the application of a colour bar running through all levels of American life . For years , it was accepted without question – largely because it was Nina ’ s own version – that prejudiced white men denied her the classical career for which she was destined and to which she believed herself entitled . Blaise Pascal says that all men ( and presumably women , too ) are destined to spend their lives doing the thing they are second-best at . Maybe that was the case with Nina Simone . All her life , she continued to quote Bach in her playing and to drop in references to Beethoven sonatas , the way jazz musicians might include quotes from Broadway standards . It was her way of saying that she had once been bound for better things . Even after her career as a popular entertainer began – after the birth of Nina Simone , one might say – she returned from Atlantic City , where she was becoming a star , and played Beethoven all day , much as a deep sea diver might spend a day in a decompression chamber . Unfortunately , though it also fuelled her most passionate art in later years , the pressure of rejection never left her . Whether she correctly identified its source and rationale is somewhat irrelevant . Eunice / Nina wrote a version of her own story into the wider story of her people . Her rejection was part of a wider
14