1961: Desperate
Nine years gone. The child had turned into a teenager. This was around the time of the village exam, which
determined whether he could continue his study in senior secondary school. He studied hard. On the day
his result was released, his elder brother read it aloud for him: “98 out of 100!”. Yes! He did it! For the whole
day, he was immersed in that overjoyed feeling. Yet, it was always the bitterness that came after. Two days
later, it was announced that no children of landlords could continue their schooling in senior secondary
schools. Having heard the announcement, he ran to the riverside alone and bursted out crying. He told me
that it was the first time he cried after his house was confiscated. He didn’t cry when his mother
abandoned him. He didn’t cry at the brink of death when he had a pneumonia. But this time, he cried. It
wasn’t because he didn’t work hard enough; it wasn’t because he had done anything wrong; but because
he was born in a landlord’s family, something that he couldn’t decide! Since then, he hid all his aspirations
and fantasies about his future deep inside his heart and buried them alive. “Where was I when this all
happened? Would it be possible for me as an educator to change the story if I were there?”, I asked myself
repeatedly. My answer is no. I might be able to give him care, warmth and encouragement but still what
individuals could do were limited in front of such social injustice with the lack of authority. To him, I feel
proud not only because he is my father, but also because he is as a sacrifice of that era and that he went
through all those that I can’t even imagine.
~
*The Land Reform Movement was a political reform in China in the 1950s. The government confiscated all
the land and properties of landlords and reallocated the land to peasants. The reform teams encouraged
peasants to bully landlords and their families, causing the death of millions of people, most of which were
the landlords and the educated.
JUNE 2017
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