NEW ::: POETRY Apr. 2015 | Page 65

We were in the hospital all together and we didn't know Our Lord and Savior, coming to kill us swiftly, so quickly with his thin, pocket Sci-Fi killing machine. Passing around the tasers, maybe that would get their attention. In fact, we were having 7 Eleven ice cream in all flavors all three or four, in the small little girl cups that Beatrice wanted to blossom in the snow wanting to breathe freely without the cigarette smoke coming from all the vehicles. In the parking lot I saw a man named Goofy Chaos a Black young man, who looked like soot and Walt Disney World. He said he had many names, and one of them sold records so long ago, when he was both a Crip and a Blood. I told him, don't kill that lesbian lady, let's give her a ride Just like in the college dorm rooms of my own mind that I had already attended But never really lived or been in for some unknown reason having to do with satanic hell, or perhaps beautiful white people. Goofy Chaos was the order of the day all around. Then Goku, the wise Scruffy version, showed up and tried to fulfill all our dreams. He was going to kill us all, rather than making us stand around waiting To die of choking, horrible surgeries, and other things Goku knew. I marveled at his Muslim wisdom and his deep and abiding courage. Then Andrea, the wisest woman I have ever, who knows Jezebel from the Bible is fascinating to her and she is NOT "them" and she and my best friend forever hides in the bookcase Behind a secret compartment that nobody gives a hoot about. You see, Andrea wants to lead a real normal life. Certain Jewish people have no idea of what they are, uh, missing. Certain Christian people wonder at how anyone goes on living. Certain Muslim people want to be good forever, and sigh for a very long time. I just want another cup full of vanilla plastic spoon ice cream. My application for forgiveness Long denied and cast away I must contend for my redemption Thus begins a losing game Substitution seemed the answer Something else to kill the pain Although seeking something deeper What found me was quite the same Yet satisfied with what I tried The dope worked like a charm To ease the hurt and make things work Assuring me no harm Suddenly- The boat got shaky As the cost for joy increased Though I didn't have the money The drugs still wait for me From then on I was willing All I need is to get high As I'm planning future binges Speed preoccupies my mind I sold my soul for these addictions I won't stop until I'm gone I try hard not to admit it I had lost and they had won Face to face with my own master And the keeper of my soul GLINDA BUSTAMANTE My desire overwhelms me, INo longer in control This life's not worth the living If my life is not my own I chose these pills against my will And now I can't go home We watch my body whither Wane too weak and frail for looks I don't care for my appearance Just one hit is all it took This world says things are over There's no choice but to give up This hell was too expensive Though my life was not enough KAREN COLE THE DOPE GAME