die knocks him over by simply
blowing in his direction, a know-
ing acknowledgement from the
film as to how paper thin he is.
All I can recall of Howard’s Claire
from the previous film was her
penchant for fleeing from ram-
paging dinos while wearing
heels. Thanks to the mocking
from the internet over that inci-
dent of impracticality (in a movie
about a theme park filled with
formerly extinct dinosaurs), the
heels are gone, and with them
her one defining quality.
The remaining cardboard
shells of Owen and Claire find
themselves back on Isla Nub-
NJ STAGE - ISSUE 48
lar in an attempt to save the
dinos from an imminent volca-
nic eruption. There are a lot of
dumb details in Fallen Kingdom,
but retroactively making Spiel-
berg’s original equally dumb by
association and having us be-
lieve Richard Attenborough was
thick enough to build a theme
park next to a volcano is the
most insulting of the lot.
Accompanying Owen and
Claire on the expedition are a
bunch of generic mercenaries
(why do these guys always have
cockney accents?) who it turns
out want to get the dinos off the
island for a far less benevolent
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