Naleighna Kai's Literary Cafe Magazine May - Mother's Day Issue | Page 49

know how to handle it. Strange thing
was, for a woman who didn’t want
children in the first place, I was
taking foster classes so that I could
adopt another child because I had this
motherhood thing in hand. Well, my
son hit puberty and cured me of that
notion. The woman from the agency
called me at one point and said, “Ms.
Woodson, we haven’t seen you in the
last few classes.” With all the chaos
I was going through with my son at
the time, I replied, “Lady, I don’t want
the little m----------r I got, and I don’t
want your little m----------rs, either.”
She asked, “how old is your son?” I
answered, “twelve.” She laughed and
said, “We’ll talk to you in a few years.”
They’re still waiting.
So, to be honest, I became my
biological mother for a short period
of time during those teen years. I took
his actions personally, as if I had failed
somehow, instead of understanding
the unbalance--chemical, mental,
physical, and all that was happening to
him at that time. My actions resulted
in my doing the grown up thing
when he was on the way to college. I
apologized. He deserved chastisement,
but not to the level that I administered.
He forgave me. Bless his little happy
heart. He forgave me.
The Creator knew to pair me up with
the perfect child to facilitate a series
of lessons of loving someone outside
of myself. The lesson of realizing that
there were more important things in life
than the darkness that I’d experienced
growing up. And on another note, the
same holds true for my son. He needed to
come through his father and me because
he had his own series of lessons to learn.
Sometimes the thing that we think we
don’t want is the very thing that we need
for our spiritual development. We’ll
swear up and down that we’ll never do
X, Y, or Z. And The Creator says, “Oh,
yeah? Let me see what we can do about
that.” Basically, it’s because energy
follows thought. When you put emphasis
on what you don’t want, it’s taking the
focus off the things you do want. And
trust me, the things you don’t want always
come with a calling card: Remember that
statement you made a kabillion years
ago? Well, since you feel so strongly
about it, you must really want to tackle
it. And then … BAM! Suddenly you’re
paddling upstream without a boat, or
without a paddle for that matter. You’re
now tackling a challenge that you swore
you never wanted to wade through in the
first place.
When I was talking to a friend and he
asked about J. L. (as we call my Number