eagerness in his talk , an immediate , sympathetic friendliness , accompanied by quick , graceful movements . The evening brought back memories of my first meeting with Prof . Sarabhai — as if it was yesterday . The world of Prof . Sarabhai was internally simple and externally easy . Each of us working with him was driven by a single-minded need to create , and lived under conditions which made the object of that need directly accessible . Sarabhai ’ s world was tailor-made to our dreams . It had neither too much nor too little of anything needed by any one of us . We could divide it by our requirements without a remainder .
My world , by now , had no simplicity left in it . It had become an internally complex and externally difficult world . My efforts in rocketry and in achieving the goal of making indigenous rockets were impeded by external obstacles and complicated by internal wavering . I was aware that it required a special effort of the will to sustain my trajectory . The coordination of my present with my past had already been jeopardised . The coordination of my present with my future was uppermost in my mind when I went to have tea with Prof . Ramanna .
He did not take long to come to the point . The Devil Missile programme had been shelved in spite of tremendous achievements made by Narayanan and his team at DRDL . The entire programme of military rockets was reeling under a persistent apathy . The DRDO needed somebody to take command of their missile programmes which had been stuck at the drawing board and static test bed stages for quite a while . Prof . Ramanna asked me if I would like to join DRDL and shoulder the responsibility of shaping their Guided Missile Development Programme ( GMDP ). Prof . Ramanna ’ s proposal evoked a mixture of emotions in me . When again would I have such an opportunity to consolidate all our knowledge of rocketry and apply it ?
I felt honoured by the esteem in which Prof . Ramanna held me . He had been the guiding spirit behind the Pokharan nuclear test , and I was thrilled by the impact he had helped create on the outside world about India ’ s technical competence . I knew I would not be able to refuse him . Prof . Ramanna advised me to talk to Prof . Dhawan on this issue so that he could work out the modalities of my transfer from ISRO to DRDL .
I met Prof . Dhawan on 14 January 1981 . He gave me a patient hearing , with his typical penchant for weighing everything carefully to make sure he didn ’ t miss a point . A markedly pleasant expression came to his face . He said , “ I am pleased with their appraisal of my man ’ s work ”. He then smiled . I have never met anyone with a smile quite like Prof . Dhawan ’ s — a soft white cloud — you could picture it in any shape you wanted to .
I wondered how I should proceed . “ Should I formally apply for the post so that DRDL could send the appointment order ?” I enquired of Prof . Dhawan . “ No . Don ’ t pressurise them . Let me talk to the top-level management during my next visit to New Delhi ,” Prof . Dhawan said . “ I know you have always had one foot in DRDO , now your whole centre of gravity seems to have shifted towards them .” Perhaps what Prof . Dhawan was telling me had an element of truth in it , but my heart had always been at ISRO . Was he really unaware of that ?
Republic Day , 1981 brought with it a pleasant surprise . On the evening of 25 January , Mahadevan , Secretary to Prof . UR Rao , rang up from Delhi to inform me about the Home Ministry announcement about the conferment of the