FEATURE: LANCE ARMSTONG CONT.
Emphasizing transparency, he adopted an open-door policy, encouraging honest, ongoing, open dialogue.“ Their dad was on national TV with Oprah and on the front page of every paper,” Armstrong reflected.“ We have a simple policy: We’ re going to have a conversation about this today, and if you want to have a conversation about it next week or next year, we’ re going to have a conversation. This is an open conversation. We can talk about this whenever you want. It’ s not like we’ re going to sit, talk about it, put it in a box, put it away. If this ever comes up and you want to talk to your father, come to me. I’ ll tell you everything.”
This approach was particularly beneficial for his older children. However, the younger ones, initially too young to grasp the situation, eventually developed an awareness shaped by their peers’ questions.“ Is your dad that cheater guy?” they were asked, underlining the importance of maintaining open communication as they matured.“ They didn’ t get a pass,” Armstrong noted.“ Because what is true about this world today is everything is forever. While they were one and two and didn’ t watch Oprah, they are growing into their dad’ s complicated life history— all the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’ s an amazing lesson for all of us that nothing goes away forever. This point going forward, whatever you say, do, maybe even think in the future will stick around.”
Armstrong acknowledged the pain of his circumstances but also recognized their value as a teachable moment.“ There wasn’ t a reset in parenting,” he said.“ You’ re keeping it open. They can ask you anything. You’ re not hiding it. This is who I am, and I’ ll explain it because we’ re all humans. And, at the end of the day, especially for my older kids— and the same will happen for my young ones as they grow— they’ ve watched their father survive this.”
BE UNAPOLOGETICALLY AUTHENTIC
When faced with lawsuits and the pending fallout, Armstrong wanted to come clean on his terms by appearing on Oprah.“ I thought it would be better received if I got out ahead of it,” Armstrong said.“ But it didn’ t really work. Although Oprah came out swinging, it was too much for some, and for others, it wasn’ t enough. Still, I answered all her questions honestly as I do now.”
Despite the situation, it was a turning point for him to become a completely open book about everything in his life.“ If we’ d have done this talk 10 years ago, I would have BS’ d every single person in this room,” Armstrong said.“ I don’ t BS anybody anymore. There’ s nothing off limits in my life.”
DON’ T GO DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE WHEN FACED WITH HATERS
When confronted by haters, negative interactions, and so on, many want to respond. You may be tempted to do something by rationalizing,“ I’ m not going to take this!” or“ I must
“ I’ m glad that I’ ve lived this complicated life and managed to, in my own sort of way, come out the other end.”- Lance Armstrong
do something!” But too often, people respond in a negative way that they later regret. Armstrong admits he used to lash out, but now he’ s changed his approach when provoked.
For instance, once while visiting Denver and waiting for an Uber, a group of haters recognized Armstrong and began chanting obscenities at him from a bar across the street. Rather than responding, he got in the car, left the scene, and didn’ t interact. A man of action, he calmed down, called the bar where the patrons were, and asked to speak to the manager.
“ I was so mad,” Armstrong said.“ The old Lance would have got a group of my friends and turned around. But I’ m not like that anymore. When the manager came on the phone, I said,‘ Hey, I’ m Lance Armstrong. You got a bunch of guys out there who were yelling and screaming.’ He said,‘ Man, I’ m really sorry about that.’ I said,‘ Here’ s the deal. Here’ s my credit card. Buy the whole table drinks for as long as they sit there. No matter how much they drink or what they eat, it’ s on me. But you must go over there and say,“ This is on Lance.” I hung up, and I was like, that’ s action. The wrong thing to do would have been to storm over there and get into it with them, but the right thing to do is to do something. That’ s what I came up with, and I think it worked out well.”
Armstrong also avoids reading comments on social media.“ I ignore it,” he said.“ I made one deal with myself: If anybody throws me the ball and I catch it, I’ m not dropping it again because there’ s only one person who can mess this whole thing up, and that’ s me. I’ m not dropping the ball. If people are not OK with it, that’ s totally fine.”
WHAT WOULD HE CHANGE IF HE COULD DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN?
While his answer is unpopular, he says he wouldn’ t change a thing.“ We don’ t get that opportunity in life to go back and do it all over again,” Armstrong said.“ If I had this magic wand that the interviewer seemingly has, I’ d wave it, and I’ d go back, and
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