Modern Athlete Magazine Issue 118, May 2019 | Page 22

THE RUNNING MANN surrounded by a dozen young ladies who joined our table. It turned out they were all doing their healthcare community service year in Upington, and knew “The army that William Booth founded” (Salvation Army), but not the name of “The recipient of Chris Barnard’s first successful heart transplant”(Louis Washkansky). What Jonathan and I lack in speed, we more than make up for with guile, and we managed to outsmart the finest minds in Upington to win the Nedbank floating trophy. After a victorious night, we retired to see what dramas the next day would hold. Slow Start to the Day Staying at the start venue allowed me the luxury of a few minutes extra sleep. However, there was no hurry, anyway, as the race start was delayed by a few minutes as the sound guy had ‘overslept.’ I think a wily, non-running hotel guest wanting a peaceful lie-in slipped him a couple of casino chips to keep Raasbekkie off the early morning mic! As dawn broke, we headed out of the hotel grounds. After a short loop through the suburbs, it wasn’t long before we could see the irrigation canals and hear the rustling whispers from the Orange River. The race is timed to start so that there is enough light by the time you reach the dirt track along the river, and a record field of 38 marathon runners got to enjoy a magnificent African sunrise, whilst knowing we’d probably be cursing the sun when we returned for the second lap. (There were a further 66 runners in the half marathon, 47 in the 10km and 24 in the 5km.) Wandering in the Desert The Kalahari soil is arid but incredibly fertile, and with perpetual irrigation from the Orange River, Upington is an emerald oasis in the middle of the desert – so much so that this small slice of the country is known as the Green Kalahari. Vineyards dominate much of the route and we came within 200m of the Orange River Cellars, which produces some fine red and white wine, but it is their desert dessert wine that stands out. Unfortunately, the cruelty of the route designers means you have to wait until after the marathon to earn your pudding. In addition to the vineyards, you also run past fields full of lucerne (alfalfa) and a pecan nut plantation on a section that the local runners call “The Energy Lab.” And if any additional energy or nutrients are needed, all the support tables were well stocked with food and ice-cold drinks/water. The tables also proved that you are what you eat, with the Food Lovers Market table providing delicious watermelon and other freshly cut fruit, whilst the concrete and brick manufacturing Poort Beton table laid down a 1kg slab of steak. Now if you’ve read your Old Testament, you’ll know that Jewish men like to spend long periods aimlessly wandering around the desert. It was in this spirit, and with a light sprinkling of irony, that Jonathan contacted race director Russell Nugent the week before the race to ask exactly how much time he would have to secure an official finish. (Normally it’s the ref who gets asked, “How much time is left on the clock?”) He was thrilled with the reply that, “You can take as long as you want – we’ll keep the finish line open until you arrive back.” Jonathan eventually beat Moses’ desert marathon time by the better part of 39 years, thereby securing the penultimate finishing position and the completion of a life goal. Done and Dusted In keeping with the race theme, all finishers received a unique medal in the form of a pair of spectacles, although I did reflect it was fortunate that the late John Nugent chose optometry and not proctology as a profession. Then, there is only one flight from Upington airport on a Saturday, and luckily for me this is a return to Johannesburg with the departure perfectly timed to allow for a marathon, shower, waiting for your mate to finish, a short drive to the airport and the consummation of the coldest beer in the airport fridge, before heading back to a more temperate climate. The big question during the race was which would be higher, the temperature or total number of marathon runners. I am pleased to say that we had a cool day (in the mid-30s) and this was the first year that the number of runners beat the temperature! With the heat and venomous creatures against you, the good news is that the race profile is very flat, and the organisers do their best to include as much shade as possible along the way. A flat, double-lap route with out-and-back sections might not sound like the most exciting prospect, but I never got bored. The town sections are short and interesting enough, whilst the farm roads and jeep tracks that wind through vineyards and plantations are lovely to run through, and the river section is simply exquisite. There is just one hill, known locally as “Hellfire Pass,” a short climb strategically positioned just 2km from the finish, thus ensuring that all finishers are worthy of their medal. As far as I know, finishing the John Nugent gives me a unique (and very minor) claim to fame of being the first person to have run a marathon in all 17 of South Africa’s athletics provinces (Transkei included). I have checked with all the other ‘marathon sluts’ I know and all have at least one conquest outstanding. However, if you (or anyone you know) has already achieved this feat, please let me know, so that you can get the credit due! Thumbs up for another marathon complete 22 ISSUE 118 MAY 2019 / www.modernathlete.co.za ABOUT THE AUTHOR: This is a slightly reworked version of one of Stuart’s regular running blogs, which focus on his adventures (and sometimes misadventures) running marathons and ultra-marathons all over South Africa, and occasionally in other countries. He says his lifetime goal is to attract a travel sponsor through his running blogs, so that he can run more races and share their stories. You can read the original blogs at http://runningmann.co.za, and follow him on social media @runningmann100. Hellfire Pass, strategically positioned 2km from the finish