non-reactivity practice
Active Listening, HEAR, Check the Facts, & Positive Events
45
positive events
Time: Depends on the activity you try
Goal: To focus and appreciate simple moments with a positive outlook rather than focusing on the negative
It’s only human – most people give more attention to the bad things than the good.
If you hear ten compliments, and a single criticism, you’ll probably focus on the criticism. If you notice yourself focusing on the negative aspects of an experience, try to stop and refocus on the positive. Practice by doing a small positive activity every day while making a point to acknowledge the good parts (even if things aren’t perfect). Don’t let minor problems ruin the moment.
Adding one or two positive activities won’t change you life, but over time, the happiness they created will start to add up. Here are a few ideas for quick positive activities to get you started:
1. Have an unrushed meal
2. Watch a movie
3. Go for a walk
4. Give yourself a relaxing night in
5. Try a new hobby
6. Put on headphones and do nothing but listen to music
7. Have a picnic
8. Visit a local attraction or museum
9. Visit with friends or family
check the facts
Time: 2 minutes
Goal: Check assumptions for accuracy
Maybe you can look back at your life and think of a few situations where you overreacted. Or you might notice that something once felt like a big deal when it was really pretty unimportant. You can check the facts in the moment to help reduce the intensity of these extreme emotions. Ask yourself the following questions to check the facts:
1. What event triggered my emotion?
2. What interpretations or assumptions am I making about the event?
3. Does my emotion and intensity match the facts of the situation? Or does it just match my assumptions of the situation?
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