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Day 2 . Life is turned upside down ( continued )
SAID ALOUD
Trainer . The story continues ...
Before , she carried her most important memories and longings in her wings . Now , they frightened her deeply . She tried to distance herself from them . She used all her energy not to think and not to feel . Her husband ’ s words poured into her right ear . “ You cannot stay . You are a sick , crazy person – dirty , and dangerous for me . I do not want you here . Go away !” She wandered far from the river , stumbling and falling . She walked as if she was asleep , leaving her children behind . She had no tears left . The ache in her womb was intense , but she scarcely felt it .
PART II : THE TRAINING
Trainer . This is the story so far . It includes the horrible rape that the Butterfly Woman experienced . Before we go on , we will take a short break , to relax and stretch . Then we will come back , to do some exercises and see what happens next , because this story will become a healing story .
But first , I must underline that , when you tell this story to survivors , never include horrible details of the traumatic event . The details of the rape may waken a survivor ’ s trauma-memories . If this occurs , a victimised woman will not be able to listen any more . She will re-live her own experience and lose the feeling of safety that she had when she sat with you .
Instead , you can say things like : “ Terrible things happened to the Butterfly Woman , which changed her life ”. Or “ Things happened by the river that darkened her life ”, etc . The woman will understand what her helper is saying and will feel safe . She will trust you when she notices that you do not scare her . She will be able to think clearly and to understand what the story is describing , and will understand that you are telling the story ( which is her own story ) in a safe way . One can also ask a survivor to say how the rape should be named so that it will be tolerable for her .
Exercise 6 . Exploring different trauma reactions . ( 15 minutes .)
EXERCISE
Try to feel the different forms of reaction .
• Go into “ freeze mode ”. Tighten all your muscles . Stand still and feel the tension in your body .
• Go into “ fight mode ”. Make your body ready to fight . Tighten your muscles and activate your aggression .
Feel the differences in these two states .
Try also to experience different and opposite feelings . Be happy and grieving , depressed and elated , angry and calm , etc .
Copy the Trainer and use your own ideas . Try to show your state of mind with your body . This exercise will help you to observe such reactions in a survivor .
BREAK 15-20 MINUTES .