Fully masked and too busy to think about drinking water , she assumed she was dehydrated . It wasn ’ t until she sat down for lunch around 3 p . m . that she knew something was wrong .
“ All of a sudden I started to eat and I was like , ‘ Oh my God , I can ’ t taste my food .’ Panic set in , because especially then , that was the big thing . You lose your taste and smell ,” she says .
She immediately left for home to begin what she expected would be a two-week period of isolation and rest . A positive test the next day confirmed she had COVID-19 . For the next few weeks , crippling headaches and fatigue like she ’ d never before experienced kept her mostly confined to her bed . After about a month , the headaches began to subside , only to be replaced by cardiac symptoms like chest pain and an elevated heart rate . A former marathon and triathlon runner who worked out six days a week , Macedo now found herself winded from walking to the end of her driveway . Tests revealed she had myocarditis , a swelling of the heart muscle seen in some patients with COVID-19 , as well as pericardial effusion , a buildup of fluid around the heart .
As the weeks wore on , she began noticing other things . Simple tasks that were once routine now left her stumped and forgetful . Conversations were difficult to remember , and driving to her husband ’ s workplace a short distance away from her Cranston home now proved impossible without GPS . Cooking , a favorite activity , became a minefield as she struggled to focus on simple recipes with no sense of taste to guide her .
“ To go from that level of functioning to literally barely making it through a day at home was just — that was eye-opening ,” she says . “ It starts to play with your head a little bit .”
Difficulty concentrating , chest pain and shortness of breath are all symptoms of what the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention calls post-COVID conditions , better known as long COVID . In January of 2021 , Macedo began visiting Lifespan ’ s Long Covid Clinic for patients experiencing symptoms weeks or months beyond their initial infection . She took a leave of absence from work while following a regimen of physical therapy and medication to get back to her functioning self . Nine months
after her initial positive test , she finally felt ready to return . She resumed her old job at Rhode Island Hospital in July 2021 , starting off in four-hour shifts . Anything more , and the headaches would return , bringing with them the fatigue that forced her back to bed .
“ Every day that would go by that I was not able to go back to work I was getting more nervous and sad thinking , ‘ Oh my God , what if I don ’ t return to work ?’ ” she says .
MACEDO ’ S STORY — OF ANXIETY , illness and a life disrupted by COVID-19 — is familiar to those living through the front lines of the pandemic . Though most health care workers evaded the debilitating effects of long COVID , nearly all have faced the strain of working under the constant threat of a potentially life-altering illness , made real by the suffering of patients every day . For most , the toll has been not physical but mental as pandemic life brought years of stress and burnout beyond their breaking point , forcing front-line medical workers across the industry to adjust their lives as a result .
“ I feel like in medicine , it ’ s always a balance of wins and losses . You have this bucket that ’ s about half-full all the time because if it was too full , it would bubble over ,” says Dr . Bradley Collins , a hospitalist at Miriam Hospital . “ With the pandemic , it was just constantly being at patients ’ bedsides , holding iPads for them when they were dying so they could say their farewells to their family members , understanding that people couldn ’ t visit because we had to try to keep the public safe . We didn ’ t have those wins to sort of empty the bucket a little bit . I think it got to a point for some of us where that got so full , even little things would cause it to spill over .”
Jacqueline Insana , a psychiatric nurse working in Rhode Island , describes the large number of patients in need of behavioral and mental health services as a “ second pandemic .” As levels of anxiety and depression have increased nationwide , so too have the needs of providers who care for patients . Sometimes , she says , she ’ ll receive texts or phone calls from friends working in health care seeking advice regarding their own mental health — where to find
“ TO GO FROM THAT LEVEL OF FUNCTIONING TO LITER A LLY BARELY MAKING IT THROUGH A DAY AT HOME WAS JUST — THAT WAS EYE-OPENING . IT STARTS TO PLAY WITH YOUR HEAD A LITTLE BIT .”
— HELENE MACEDO
52 RHODE ISLAND MONTHLY l MAY 2022