May 2018 Issue #7 B4Y May 2018 Issue #7 B4Y | Page 60

In total, I danced for 45 minutes. Not bad
for a first-timer. I wouldn’t have stopped,
either, if Dougie hadn’t come to get me.
In the end, I made $310.
Magic Mike moves
Splash is how I got into stripping. But I also danced at another bar uptown
that shall remain unnamed. In between gigs, I would go on Craigslist or
hit up some of my former coworkers, and do private parties. I’ve probably
danced at like 40 private parties and only one of them was for women. Ev-
ery other single one was for guys.
I saw the new Magic Mike, and I loved it, but I have a one major gripe. Con-
trary to how they bill it, it’s not a movie for girls. It’s a movie for guys who
think all they have to do is work out and hang out with their dudebros, and
they’ll get to perform in front of hordes of attractive women who all want to
fuck them. That’s not the reality of it at all. Most of the time you’re dancing
for dudes because dudes are the ones who spend money on strippers. That
goes for both gay and straight men. A guy is guy whether he fucks men or
women. We’re visual creatures, you know? That movie is a male fantasy,
pure and simple.
When I did the bachelorette party, I went with a former colleague from
Splash. It was somewhere in Soho. He was a tall, built Dominican dude.
And, he was gay, but the ladies loved him. He also brought along his cousin,
who was shorter and stockier. There was no theme. We just went there and
did our shit. We weren’t like firemen or cops or anything.
When we got there, the women were already sauced. Sometimes, in the
gay clubs, people would try to slip their hands down my pants and grab my
cock. What was so remarkable about these girls was how shy and polite
they were. “Is it ok if I touch you?” “Yeah, sure. No problem.” They would
kind of just caress my arm or chest or something. I didn’t feel flustered in the
least. There’s a difference between a 120-lb. woman putting her hands on
you, and a 200-lb. dude.
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