all right, but
I think you
already know
that’s not how
this is going to
work.
You can take away the scary
girl but there’s a reason he
has connected with her, and
the reason doesn’t disappear
when she does. He will
connect with another one just
like her—or at least, equally
emotionally toxic.
Dear Terrified Mama,
There are many ways in which
I can relate to what you said,
so I can well understand
your fears. Having survived
plenty of those nightmares,
I wouldn’t wish them on
anyone.
Your letter raises a few
concerns and all of them lead
back to your son. Whether he
goes to rehab or to another
continent or to the moon, the
source of the problem will be
right there with him because
it begins with how he views
himself and the world.
He can go to rehab but if he
doesn’t really commit to his
own wellbeing, he can give it
all the lip service he wants,
be let out, and go right back
to living the way he has been
for years.
The only way he will begin
to surround himself with a
healthier environment and
people who are a much more
positive influence is if he heals
his relationship with himself.
That’s what is at the center of
this mess and there’s nothing
external that can fix it.
He’s got to want it for himself
and then follow through on
making the changes that will
get him to a much better place.
I wish I could tell you that
moving him somewhere else
would make everything be
All of us have
our lessons
to learn, our
paths to walk.
Just love him
and support him as best
as you can, but mind your
boundaries. Do not allow
yourselves to be manipulated
or enable him. You might
want to look into some sort
of support for families of
addicts to be sure you don’t
get caught up in an unhealthy
cycle in which you and your
husband become your son’s
emotional hostages.
Best of luck to you.
Liberty
Liberty
Forrest is
an awardwinning
inspirational
author and
Huffington Post contributor. For five
years, she did frequent phone-ins on
the BBC as a psychic/medium. With
a background in social work and
counselling, Liberty’s unique program
uses a highly creative multifaceted
approach to get people unstuck so
that they can move forward in their
personal and spiritual evolution.
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