I felt severe rejection from her.
Soon my mom made peace with
us and I began to go to church
again. I felt torn between my
birth family and Christian family
and my new little family and my
husband. I wanted my husband
to share in my affection for my
family and the things of God, but
he hated “those people.” He
thought Christians were hypocrites and was always putting
them down, along with women
and fat people.
In November 2008, I accidentally
burned my house down by discarding our cigarettes in the
trash can that was propped up
outside the house. Three weeks
later my husband filed for divorce, got immediate temporary
custody of our four children and
required me to have supervised
visitations with my kids. I then
became numb. Even today I am
not allowed to check my kids out
of school and feel like an outcast.
was finished with me. I knew I
needed something drastic to
help me overcome my lifelong
story of despair.
May of 2013, I asked Pastor
Karen about Mary’s Song.
I am here today to testify that
Jesus Christ can deliver you and I
from depression and negativity.
The Good News is positive and
depression no longer haunts me
when I wake up every morning.
I wake up praising God because
In 2001, he built us a beautiful
Soon after this I stopped going
He is worthy and I am nothing
home and moved me and my
to church and gave up on God.
without Him. He cannot come
three babies to Ponchatoula.
The next year I got into another second to a husband, children,
After the move the marriage got very dysfunctional relationship. I
parents or even my selfishness
difficult.
began to drink and became a
workaholic waiting tables 12-14 or the lies in my head. Every-
“ For I know the plans I have for you , declares the Lord,
plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11
The Lord blessed me with the
joys of motherhood and once
again blessed me with a job
working in a Christian school.
He also gave me some genuine
Christian friends. But I felt torn
between my Christian faith and
my submission to my husband
and even though I prayed for my
husband and my marriage and
tried to be a godly wife and
mother, I felt severely depressed
and became suicidal.
I sought the help of a Christian
psychologist who counseled me
and proceeded to medicate me.
Neither his seven years of counseling nor the medication helped
me. I began to neglect giving my
children attention and would
stay in bed all day and watch TV.
thing in me must bow down to
his Word. I thank Him for plucking me up out of my empty life
and putting me once again into
His glorious Kingdom. He’s the
God of another chance. He’s the
Author and Finisher of my faith,
and He’s my real husband. I
know He has a good plan for me
But God had another salvation
and will work out my shameful
plan for me. At the end of 2012 past, my present and my future
after constant battles with my
for His glory. I leave you with
children, my boyfriend moved to
this: Jeremiah 29:11, “ For I
Gatlinburg, Tennessee, something inside told me to start go- know the plans I have for you ,
ing to Victory Fellowship on Sun- declares the Lord, plans to prosday nights after I dropped my
per you and not to harm you,
kids off at their dad’s house. I
plans to give you hope and a futhen started feeling the presture.” ●
ence of God again in my life
whereas before I thought Jesus
hours a day. My children lost
respect for me because I wouldn’t break up with my boyfriend
for them. I wanted them to understand that he was a comfort
to me and made me feel loved
rather than feeling the constant
pain of the loss of not having
them with me.