When that progressive body closure
comes to the head, the eyes are the
first to suffer. When you see the
old entering the showers with their
reading glasses you realize there is
trouble. We cannot even see parts of
our own bodies with our naked eyes.
Today, it’s full drama when I try to
cut my nails without the readers. I
stretch my arms at full length, then
raise my fingers up, aim at them
with my cutter and still miss my
own nails by a whole inch.
Besides things shutting down at the
top, funny hairs begin to sprout from
unfamiliar places. When I was in
high school, one of our chefs, sorry,
cook, called Kahagu, God bless his
soul, was an amazing old man. He
had bushy eyebrows and all manner
of hairs, both black and white,
protruding from his nose and ears. I
always found that weird.
The other day I went to the barbers
and when he was done with my hair,
he asked if he could cut hairs in my
ear and nose. OMG! That is when I
realized, the fat lady had sung!
Marketers should also focus on cell
phone innovations when it comes
to the old. Make phones with big
fonts, big touchscreens and which
can shout. These days I have to hold
my phone with my arm stretched at
full length to see who is calling or
read to messages (except the M-pesa
ones).
I am also getting blamed for bad
‘‘Clothes designers
do not help matters,
what is this fashion
craze with “slim fit”
clothes. To fit in them
you need to have flat
stomach and a wellbalanced body. Do
they know how many
millions of people of
over forty years they
have disfranchised?’’
communication habits because most
calls disconnect as I am looking for
my readers. Most times we blame
poor networks or low phone volume,
but man, the ears have also started
giving way.
The other day I went to club 1824.
Based on the name of the club,
I thought it would be a place for
people who would resonate with
those years. To my shock, the place
was full of young people dancing in
weird styles. The girls were dancing
very close to the boys like in the
‘slow’ or ‘blues’ of those days. The
girls also did all the hard work while
the boys looked nonchalant despite
the girls gyrating on them.
And what is this style of girls
holding chairs with one hand
and then bending over ‘twerking’
and shaking their bottoms like
malfunctioning compactors?
I tried Vibro, a club in Langata. It
is sure an entertainment place, but
everyone looked like they were on
chill pills.
At Vibro, there is no dress code for
hanging out. Anything will do. The
dancing style was also odd. Everyone
danced slowly with very limited
movement at the waist but suddenly
making short side jerks with one leg
like something had just bitten their
heels.
After each song, they all walked
back to their seats and immediately
came back when the next song
started. Is that a recommended
medical break?
Our bodies might be letting us
down by closing shop much earlier
than we would like, but marketers, is
there something we can do to extend
and make enjoyable the closing
hours on this ignored side of life?
And please don’t tell me about the
‘customer lifetime value’ nonsense,
we know there is nothing much left,
but even an old cow has some ticks
on it.
Herman Githinji is a seasoned Sales
and Marketing Consultant currently
serving as the Agri-Business Director at
Kenya Markets Trust (KMT). You can
commune with him on this and related
issues via email at: Hermangithinji@
gmail.com.
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