Mag Blog Radio Expressions Volume 1 Issue 4 | Page 18

Writings from Foster Care by Precious Jewel Rooks

17

Sunrise

Normal

Being adopted is like going to a petting zoo.
Everyone goes to the babies first before deciding which one they want to pet.
Being a teenager wanting to get adopted is a lot like this process.
the babies go first even before the teenagers get out so much as a hello.
We are the last kid to get picked for a... recess games.
We are the burnt cookie on the plate.
People try to tell us that we are important but how can we believe that
when all we've ever seen are the backs of peoples heads
as they walk out of our lives with our hope in one hand and our sanity in the other.
we are left one by one
day by day
waiting for them to turn around and give us our happily ever after.
but by the time they do
it's too late we are tossed out on the street with no where to go.
we are too old to be taken care of.
Now stop and imagine being told you are too old to have a family.
too old to have a place to call yours.
you wonder why we are so messed up
yet you don't realize that if you only gave us a chance,
we could be your baby too.
you can hold us when we cry,
take care of us when we are sick,
you can even give us a kiss goodnight.
just take a chance and maybe just maybe
you'll get a surprise.

You get a lot of stupid questions being a foster child.
What kind of food do you eat?
Do you share clothes....or underwear?
Do you get to be a normal child?
My answer:...
What kind of food do you eat?
No...No we do not share underwear.
and normal? As far as I am concerned normal is overrated.
when I get asked questions like these
I smile at them as though I am a puppet
moving at the hands of another.
Being a foster kid doesn't mean we are evil and psychotic
because of what movies preserves us as.
We are as normal as a beaten puppy
after it's owner finally tosses it out on the street.
I am not telling you this for your pity
I am telling you this because I am tired of the pity,lies, and broken promises.
I am not here to offend you or make you uncomfortable but I am here to tell you
When you meet with us to take us.
You need to remember that we can smell your fear,
we can weed the rotten ones out like a farmer picking apples.
we can see if you slip out of the door with your tail between your legs
because we are "too hard to handle"
I am not trying to scare you away but remind you that
no matter how much we want to be normal for you,
we remember who WE are.
We are broken and lost, angry and hurt.
but we are gentle and kind and all we want is the chance to be loved