MADEXXX
call her “QB” for short), is
the grown-up version of the
mean girl you avoided in the
hallways in high school. She
is calculating, manipulative,
and often engages in socially
aggressive behaviors such as
gossiping, or social exclusion,
isolation and alienation in
order to demoralize other
women in the workplace. A
study conducted by Cecilia
Harvey, a London-based
consultant and founder of
Tech Women Today, and
published in the journal
Development and Learn-
ing in Organisations,
revealed that 70% of female
executives feel they have
been bullied by women in
their office and that it has
inhibited their professional
development as a result.
How to Spot the
Queen Bee
The QB is typically a female,
Type-A executive who has
a lot of influence in the
workplace. She may be one
of few or maybe the only one
“at the top”, and she likes it
that way, appearing to enjoy
the spotlight. She takes pride
in being “one of the boys”
and possesses an assertive-
ness and almost boisterous
personality which appears
to set her apart from other
women in the room. Some
QB’s may even have a brand
for empowering women, but
their behavior toward their
subordinates reveals some-
thing entirely opposite.
At times, it may be easy to
spot the QB, but other times
it could be a little while
before she reveals her
true colors. I’ve been in both
situations, myself. In one
position, I felt demoralized
and manipulated and
my instincts told me I was
being talked about unfavor-
ably behind closed doors, but
the realizations didn’t hit me
until the damage had already
been done. Another time, I
was able to spot the type of
person I was dealing with
after the first interview. I’ve
also experienced a
professional relationship that
completely unraveled and
became toxic once I “stepped
out of line” by having a
difference of opinion. The
key to identifying a QB is
not an exact science, but I’ve
found that personal intuition
plays a huge part in it. If
you’ve observed the typical
traits mentioned above,
chances are you’re dealing
with a QB. Other tell tale
signs might be that you’re
feeling underutilized at work
despite your qualifications
or having asked for more
responsibility, your opinions
are not welcome if they are
#mademaven
different from hers, you
feel undermined and/or
manipulated by her actions
on a consistent basis, or the
overall work environment
lacks professionalism.
Getting the QB to
Trust You
Gaining the QB’s trust, on a
base level, means delivering
excellent work product
and always being accessible,
even after hours. Were you
expecting something more
profound? QB’s expect the
same excellence and attitude
from you that they strive for
as well.
In your interactions with
the QB, you should always
be gracious. Also, accept
criticism - even if it’s harsh -
with an open mind. Try to
interpret it in a way that you
can swallow, rather than how
she delivers it. Never
become defensive. Take
a walk if you need to give
yourself a moment to digest
and pull the true meaning
from the message. Besides,
tough skin in the workplace
builds resilience, right?
Above all, be your true
self and try not to doubt
yourself or your abilities. Just
like dogs can smell fear –
QB’s can smell sweat.
And you should never, ever
let a QB see you sweat. Or
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